The Omega and The Alpha

Dear Readers,

This is the trailer for an upcoming book…(The costumes, plot line, props, etc, are what I have been working on instead of my original fiction…pbbbllltttttt! But the idea hit and off I went, literally) …which is the last book in The Shadow of The Throne trilogy. No need to watch unless you feel so inclined. I am just posting it different places and seeing how it looks, operates, reacts, etc.

Be safe in your out and about time.

Be blessed and be the blessing,

CES

Whose Hands?

Dear Readers,

For those that know me, I am fiercely proud of my faith, my family and my country. I apologize to no one for what I carry in my heart. And from time-to-time I blatently share those beliefs on this site.

For those of you who do not believe in God, no need to watch the video. (Or perhaps you do…..lolololol) For those of you who do, it is a very short clip with a powerful message. It touched my spirit and at the end, I was weeping in joy. It was definitely something that I needed to hear at that moment. God does provide.

I do not know who this gentleman is, but God bless him.

Be blessed and be the blessing.

Carroll

 

Be Blessed and be the Blessing

John 4,5

Dear Readers,

Our world is not as it once, was. It will never be a as it once, was. And this is not because of a virus or a war.

Jesus did that. He changed this planet forever. Because the tomb is empty throw at me what you will.  God is my Father and Jesus is my brother and this piece of rock is not my home.

To quote the angel at the tomb: “Jesus is not here, He has risen!”

Be blessed and be the blessing,

CES

 

March is National Women’s History Month

Purple_selfieMarch is National Women’s History Month.

In this thirty-one-day calendar span that is neither winter or spring, that comes in roaring like a lion and out like a lamb, we celebrate women!

Here is to those who pioneered art, literature, aviation, the sciences, medicine and architecture.  Women who were willing to sacrifice everything for their ideas:  Molly Pitcher, who could see the vision of a country ruled without a king.  While the British torched the White House, Dolly Madison secured our country’s greatest legacy, The Constitution, before fleeing the burning building.  How can we speak of great women in America without mentioning Harriet Tubman who helped to man the Underground Railroad.  And lastly, but certainly not least, the women who don the uniform of the United States military services, police officers, fire fighters, first-responders, and all those who serve selflessly in a humanitarian role.

We are the hands that rock the cradle and sometimes the world.  Some of our not-so-glamorous moments is when History records us as Jezebel, a name uttered in contempt or with a great deal of smug righteousness.  Mata Harie, a spy who bedded, learned and then handed over secrets to the Germans.  And there are several other names floating around out there that have had way too much press time the past couple of months that I refuse to mention here.

What is a girl to do?

I need someone with a little more clout and poetic heart than myself to tell all of you that I think that you are all heroes.  I checked with Billy Shakespeare (who wrote tremendous love sonnets but my Shakespearean professor insisted that these were tongue-in-cheek, written about other men…) pardon me while I roll my eyes.   So, he is indeed not the man to voice his opinion at this time.  (Way too much death, references to nunneries and hints of incest.)

And so, that leaves me (sorry folks) to write about the great heroines that grace and have graced my life.

Behind the beautiful faces that I encounter every day as I go to and fro are women that I have come to love and respect.  I know that behind that dazzling smile is a strength that cannot be measured with any highly calibrated scientific instrument.  We are the consummate professionals at what we do whether it is for pay or not.  We are fearless.  We face down anything or anyone that threatens our children or the sanctity of our home; customs officials’ whose language we do not understand and transportation officers with a list of reasons why our household goods can not be packed out in a timely manner…and the biggest boogie man of all…our own personal fears.  And all of this can happen in just a manner of seconds, less than sixty, but who is counting.

Remember Ginger Rogers who did all the same dance steps as Fred Astire, only backwards, in high heels and always in some type of long, flowing evening gown.   Well, that is us.  Not that our spouses’ agendas are the same as ours, but at times we must work through their system, with nothing to back us except the status of  “This is my wife…”  (Please pardon me while I have a laughing fit and fall out of my chair!)

And there are now seven days to payday with six unexpected guests coming to dinner.  Oh yes, and he just called again to inform you that he won’t be able to make the dinner party because he is at that moment out the door and will back on Tuesday…that would be, of course, the Tuesday two weeks from now…and he ends the phone conversation with “And say Babe, I know you are busy but could you possibly take ten minutes and pack a bag for me…and I guess you know that the baby is crying.”

Really?

Oh yes, we know…pardon us while we take a moment and then back to work.

Because our sisterhood has all experienced these smallish, last minute changes, more than once, it only takes one phone call and magically, many things are put in motion.  A casserole comes out of one neighbor’s freezer. There are now fresh tomatoes in your kitchen nurtured from the plant that you can see out your kitchen window, and from further down the street dessert appears at your door.

Perhaps March is the most appropriate month of all for us.  For at times we are the roaring rampart lion and other times the lamb.  But mostly, we exist someplace in the middle, always with grace and dignity sandwiched in between, just striving to be ourselves.

And so here is to us, the bearers of the xx chromosome.  Let us this month celebrate each other and our daughters as well, who will pioneer whatever fields their hearts take them too and some, whose names shall be recorded will shake the foundations of time with their accomplishments.

As for me, I know that my name will never be found in a history book or noted in any scholarly tome.  I find great comfort in that for I know that is not what I am about.  The greatest honor for me would be to find it etched in the hearts of the people that I love.

 

 

 

#walkinfaith

Gentle Readers,

Your life is a gift. At times you overflow with joy and other times you weep and you think the grief is going to consume you.

At times, life is just Embrace the Suck and frankly, from my point of view, nothing about this walk upon this Earth is fair.  Evil has its way and leaves the innocent trampled in its aftermath.

How do you let those moments define you?

My life is defined by my faith. Jesus did not promise me an easy ride through my time here on Earth. I am to play the hand I am dealt and walk by faith. My reward comes when my brother welcomes me Home and introduces me to my Father.

Sermon over. If you want to know what inspired these remarks, read on. For everyone else, be blessed and be the blessing.

 

Written: 6 February, 2020

Greetings one and all from beautiful Denver. We have a lovely view from outside the fourth-floor window at St. Anthony’s Hospital. I have an even lovelier view sitting across from me. That would be Bill, my husband, God’s very own gift from Him to me…and a gift to the rest of the world that knows this fabulous man.

On 2/2/20 we left Dulles and landed in Denver for our vacation.  We took a shuttle to Breckenridge and arrived at The Grand Colorado Resort. Since our room was not finished, we had lunch and they let Bill into the room and he changed and went skiing.

Around two-ish I checked into the room. The luggage was there waiting for us.

I am looking around. We did good! We traded our not this gorgeous time share for here. Tis indeed lovely, I am thinking and admiring the view. Snow abounds! The mountains are gorgeous!

There was a knock at the door. Opening it, there stood a guy with a small box that contained a bottle of wine, cheese/crackers, crackers/dipping sauce and some chocolate. Handing me the box, he left.

And I was thinking, well okay. We told them no, we did not wish to take the tour to buy into the time-share here. Perhaps this is just a small bribe to  get us to do the walk-about with one of their agents. Although, I am also thinking  I have never had this happen before!

Upon closer inspection, there is a card attached to the front. It says *Happy Birthday! Happy Birthday! And I am looking at this and thinking What the fuck? I opened the card and inside was written Happy Birthday Ave Maria…and I thought to myself…how odd, that some would name their daughter after one of my favorite Christmas Carols…(a rough English translation is you are blessed among women and you are dealing with death. You can google this if you want specifics.)

Oops! Mistake! I said to myself. No Happy Birthday here! I opened the door to tell the man that this was not intended for us, but he had already left.

Then the room phone rang. Closing the door, I picked it up and it was a police officer telling me Bill was at the aid station downstairs and he had fallen. Well shit, I am thinking, he has blown out one of his knees.

My beloved had done 4 runs and made his way back to the bottom floor of the Grand Colorado where the ski lockers are located.

On 2/20 at 2:20 Bill died. (Google The Widow Maker, heart attack.)

Just as God has a plan for everything, there was an EMT and a doc just, you know, lounging around in the ski locker area.  (Oh ha ha….) Then about 30 seconds later, a ski patrol came in checking out for the day. (All of this was caught on their security feed.) When Bill hit the floor, he was dead. The EMT started compressions and they shocked him with the d-fib. He was down  for five minutes before he started breathing.

Ambulance left with him to the hospital in Frisco and as a nurse from the Aid Station at the Grand Colorado walked me out to the police car she had her arm around me and was holding my hand, her tone of voice saying it all…”Just so you know, this does not look good.”

And I am thinking, if an RN is upset…….. and so I started praying.

In Frisco, the docs had done everything they could but they are not a Trauma One hospital and he was having another heart attack as they loaded him onto a helicopter Life Flight and I watched him take-off to Denver.

I was praying the whole time as my beloved was in the air and on his way over the mountains…and I heard God say, “Baby Girl, I have this,” and I was flooded with a sense of peace.  My Father had this…I knew that. That the Creator of all had said no to death. In my spirit I was all woohoos! and eventually I was going to find a bottle of Scotch and offer my Father a toast. But for the time being, I had to keep the human together…no tears, no  falling apart…just belief and strength and faith. I knew my spirit would see me through, this human that I wear though, at times, I could just kick its ass.

The ground crew came over and gave me a hug. “Buy a lottery ticket,” he said.

I went back into the ER and collected Bill’s clothes. The doc who had worked on him said, “Buy a lottery ticket.”

The nice police officer that took me back to Breckenridge said, “You need to buy a lottery ticket.”

All I was thinking was, “Are you kidding? I just won the biggest lottery of all.  I cannot put a price tag on Bill, but apparently God can. Hello Life, my Father says Death can just go fuck off.

I cannot say enough good things about The Grand Colorado in Breckenridge. One of their employees volunteered to take me to Denver. Security had already loaded our suitcases onto a luggage cart and was waiting for me up in the room. They got me downstairs and into this Miss L’s car where she had a bottle of water and some Chex mix waiting for me.

Off we went to Denver, in record time, I might add. For those of you who know this route, there is a tunnel that goes under the mountain.

By the time we made the tunnel, I called and talked with a nurse in ICU who told me that the stint had been placed and Bill was right there with her and I would I like to talk to him?

Well Hell Yeah!  And so I did.

It is now 2/6/ 2020 @ 1128 hrs. The doc just said he could be discharged. Saturday, we will be on our way home after spending Friday with our friends, Bob and Susie who I cannot say enough good things about!  They were here that first night, took all our luggage home with them to Colorado Springs, and have been back to check in. They will pick us up today and get us to the airport on Saturday. Our ground support…God supplied us with His finest.

In that regard, you know who your family, is…

 

Mr. Bill hates hashtags…lolololololol….so here goes

#Washedintheblood #Godalwayshasthefinalsay #Bill1Death0 #Fuckdeath #walkinfaith #deathcanjustkissmyass

Today is Monday, February 10, 2020. Bill is good. No brain damage, no damage to his heart except the Pericardium, the sac that surrounds his heart. It is functioning about 70 percent and will continue to heal and get stronger.

Closing remarks: I know some of you are wondering did Bill see lights, were angels there to welcome him, etc? At least I had those thoughts….so when I got to the hospital and into his room in ICU eventually, I asked him. “What did you and Jesus talk about?”

There was a puzzled look on his face and he was concentrating. On his face, he was clearly attempting to recall something. “I don’t remember,” he finally answered me.

I will end with this:

#thehumancannotcomprehendthegloryofGod

 

*Please Note: People who have died and come back often take that time of death and date as their “new” birthday.

I am still laughing my ass off about the box that was delivered to the wrong door. Oh hah ha! That box was a little foreshadowing. I am indeed blessed among women. And Death…ha! God is my Father, Jesus is my brother, and Death can suck it and kiss my ass.

As always, thanks for reading!

Be blessed and be the blessing,

Your old Auntie Carroll

 

 

Take No Prisoners, Curse the Moon

take no prisoners Moon 1

The characters of the Southern Vampire Mysteries belong to Miss Charlaine Harris. No infringement on my part is intended. The characters on True Blood belong to Mr. Alan Ball. No infringement on my part is intended.

I have no BETA, editor, or other such charming person. All mistakes are my own. This Story is rated M.

TAKE NO PRISONERS—Curse the Moon

 

“Wish the fuck I could stay home on All Hallow’s Eve,” Eric said to no one as he slowed the Vette down to make the turn into the neighborhood that backed up to the strip mall.  The strong order of Were greeted him, the smell coming from the direction of his club. Always have a back up plan. That is why he was still alive.

Pulling into a home that he owned in this neighborhood, he parked the Vette in the garage, got out and was vamp speed past what was left of tonight’s Halloween decorations. The wind had been fierce. The storm, he knew was magical. Some weather charmer had tried to work his worst, destroying the evening for the children and pushing ill will out into the universe.

He was hovering up in the air, well above the radar of anyone who might be watching the skies. His concentration was the rear parking lot of Fangtasia.

“Well that is just fucking wrong,” he hissed as he watched two Weres battle by the back door of the club until both were dead, blood spatter everywhere.

“Take no fucking prisoners,” he rolled his eyes, as weird just continued to happen. A pickup full of Weres pulled up, threw the bodies into the back, howled, jerked off, and drove off.

Then he was watching  Pamela running in at vamp speed with something that resembled a combination of an extremely large Were and a Hell hound mix, heavy on the Hell…not only keeping up but nipping at her heels.

All this was oddly familiar. His internal radar when to red alert!  He saw, smelt, and heard evil.  All the hairs on the back of his neck stood straight up. A very old coven with its roots dipping into the deep waters of innocent blood sacrifice had come calling!

Fangtasia had been warded against witches, and the occasionally misguided hound that meant them ill, as a bolt of lightning struck the hound and with a yelp, he went bounding off. But a full coven of the Old Continent that worshiped the evil chord of discourse could tell the supernatural world to kiss their collective evil asses on All Hallow’s Eve.  Especially when they carried the colored lights of their house. That meant that all of their sisterhood stood with them in this venture. And these horrible dwellers of puss and pestilence were somewhere fueling their magic.

There was no mistaking that smell of rot and decay, wrapped in ancient evil. And they worked for Catherine, the Queen of the Old Empire. This was not coming into his club! It was time to haul ass. It was him they wanted and he was all for dangling the bait that was The Viking. The magics that lived in his club were good souls. Everyone. They would not be tainted with this!

“Merlotte’s!” was all the time Eric had to mutter that one word  to give  Pamela her marching orders. He was proud of her always wanting to stand and fight, but fuck, sometimes you had to cut and run. The better part of valor, live to fight another day, yadda, yadda, yadda, was just to haul ass.

Sam Merlotte owned a bar and grill outside of nowhere Bon Temps. He knew this because he had sold Merlotte the property through one of his businesses. There were a couple of well placed vampire resting spots on the property if one knew where to look. Bon Temps. Yes, he mused as he dodged random spells being cast from the broom riders, who wanted to trap you in their lights.  Someone had the audacity to name the town Good Times.

But this was going to work for him tonight. Just like his lucky charm that his Grandmother passed to him worked for him every night. Merlotte’s had suffered from a tornado two nights  before  and it was closed until the repairs could be done. “You can piss and moan all you want about the Shifter being a low life shifter, but this is going to be the perfect place to regroup and lay low until the Bewitching Hour on All Saint’s Day rolls into town.  Zero three dark cannot get here fast, enough.”

 

As he sped out of Shreveport, the witches were following him. He could hear the cackling as they shouted how much they enjoyed the hunt and their lights danced across the sky like the bridge to Valhalla. Good. The club would be fine and life there would go on as usual.

He was taking no bets on Merlotte’s.

Slowing his approach, he could see the blue tarps that covered the roof and the west wall of the building. The storm that had passed through had been a towering inferno of destruction as it marched from New Orleans, north. The Queen’s residence had taken a hit, as well. Nothing like this, though. A micro downburst that had lasted five minutes had caused the excessive damage. Complete with a lightning strike that burned the north end of the building.

Entering the inside, he could smell the mold.  When the fire department showed up to put out the fire, they left their tell-tale signature. Water. And with Louisiana’s humidity, that was catastrophic.

Merlotte was going to be out of business for a while. Unless he had unlimited funds and folks that he could drop a dime on and get their asses out here 24/7 to get this piece of Were shit up and running.

“Shifters lead a double life

Death throws into their heart a knife.

Add a vampire into the mix

And shifter’s shit comes out their dicks,” Eric laughed to himself. The little on-dit had been inked onto an outhouse wall in Paris. Damn…that night had been the  very best of times…and possibly the worst!

Carefully he kept to the trees outside the rear entrance. The door was closed but the padlock had been removed.  Apparently Merlotte’s neighbors did not have a problem helping themselves to anything that was not tainted. He laughed out loud. It was all tainted!

Pam popped in. “This is good, Eric, but not the best. If they land before we activate the system, we are going to have to fight.”

“Take no prisoners,” he hissed to his child when she landed. His eyes surveyed the area. “Let’s get inside and down below.”

The door was locked. A cheap piece of business that could be opened with a credit card. Which he used to unlock the door.

Once inside, the mold was visible.  It would have to be a complete take down of the interior to get rid of the poison.

“Incoming,” Pam sighed with a grin as she hefted a butcher knife that was lying on top of the bar.

“Behind the bar, quick,” he mouthed to Pam. “Get ready to open the trap door.

My dear, darling Grandmother,” he blew her a kiss and spread out his hands. “Thank you for once more saving my life.” The witches were now window height, scanning for life inside the building.

Fluttering his fingers like he was playing the piano, he could  hear them talking above the moaning of the wind and the creaking of the tree limbs as they threw things into glass windows that were not broken out.

“Damn it all to hell!” one of them screeched. “We are denied entrance! That fucking full moon…Curse the Moon! Curse it! It is talking to everything that has an ear open tonight! I cannot scan for anything! I can not see anything! And it will not allow us entrance to the building! How is that possible? Curse the moon,” she yelled, shaking her fist at it.  “There is no taste, or touch or smell, there is no reason for this spell. I wish I had a plate of broken glass so I shove it up Northman’s ass. Fuck!” She screeched.  “Curse the moon,” she stood on her broom and lifted her robes. “Look at this unholiness,” she laughed as she straddled the handle and began to moan and wiggle about. “Oo-o-o-o… its beams of goodness, so gold, so righteous…makes me puke!

Give me my orgasm! I demand it!” There was a low, piercing moan as Hilda began to buck up and down, then sideways! “Give me…hit the fucking spot!  Just one more thrust!”

There was a clatter of wooden shoes hitting each other and then a thud as she hit the ground. “Just fuck and fall backwards in it,” she hissed as she hiked up her skirts and then began to back pedal away from the building. “There is some disease here, on the ground,” she moaned. “Broom, quick! I need to be away!”

“This place stinks of shifter,” Rhoda, the mistress of the thirteen hissed.  “The desperate type. He is hormone bound and jerking off non-stop…for…for…” she tasted the wind. “Some little twat by the name of Sookie…he desires to be her first. Why is she not here? We need a sacrifice! Curse the moon!” she screeched.

“I want to venture in,” Sorrow said. “I want this. Northman with his pants down and his dick marching to the beat of my desire. But we need an innocent to sacrifice. Where is this innocent Sookie,” the word slithered out of her mouth. “This one who holds herself above the physical sphere. Her blood would gain us purchase and we would not catch the Shifter Clap.”

“By all that is unholy,” Dirty shuttered. “Did you not hear Hilda. There is a pox on the earth, here. My sister died from the Shifter Clap. It was horrible. Ate her insides first and rotted off the rest of her body parts. While she lived…she lived through all of it until it ate her nose…collapsed it and all that putrid slim ran down her throat, choking her to death.”

“I have heard tales…” Leech shivered and pulled up a bit more on her broom. “Have never seen anyone with the Shifter Clap.”

“It is all true,” Sorrow drew a pentagram in front of her body, the color of her power radiating from it. “All true. And it happens so swiftly and the body must be burned and then the ashes spread in Holy Water…”

“What?” several hissed.

“All true….several died dealing with her remains. But dealt with they had to be. Shifter Clap is highly contagious. Can take out entire covens in one night.”

“By all that is unholy…I would still like a closer look at the spell that wards this place. It is powerful. And fueled by the cursed moon. Do shifters deal in moon magic?”

“Apparently this one does,” Streeter replied. “To get close, we would need a righteous sacrifice. This Sookie, she would be perfect but,” she screamed at the moon, “she is not here!”

“Nothing out here tonight to sacrifice,” Rhoda, replied. “Nothing that would be acceptable to our dark lord.”

“Circle back to Shreveport,” Eric heard one spit out. “Vikings are famous for doubling back and then trekking North.

What dickheads. Their mind set is that North can save them. Into the cold and frozen tundra and all that Were shit. I hope this Viking has that so ingrained in him that we catch up with him in Oklahoma City. My sisters both have covens, there. We shall see whose dark lord is the strongest.

Curse you!” she screamed at the moon. “I was promised Northman! I want fucking Northman! Curse you!” she screamed one more time, snot running from her nose and tears of anger mixed with the slime sludge going down her face, past her lips, past her chin.

Their screams of anguish filled the sky as they fled into the night, their lights of power holding no sway over the moon.

Pam shook his head no when Eric began to say something. Slowly her finger came up and pointed. There on the floor under a table with a scrub brush and a pail of soapy water and a shot gun in her hands was a female whose eyes were as round as the buttons on her chef’s jacket.

There was a vicious head shake from the woman, the bandana she had wrapped around her head giving way just a bit. She pointed East then West and made a twirling motion with her finger.

“Circling,” she mouthed. “Close by.

Three,” she held up three fingers and pointed East, “five,” she held up her hand and used it to make a forward motion to the West.

Eric was watching her…her movements were sure and steady…was she frightened, that was a great big fuck yeah! But she was doing a very fine job dealing. Perhaps this was not her first rodeo with the unseemly.

Right now, she seemed to be listening. To what, he was not for real sure. But clearly, her attention was elsewhere.

“Leaving…but not all…arguing about who stays…” she mouthed at him. Slowly and deliberately so that he could understand.

With a tilt of her head, she held her breath and then slowly let it out. “Two,” she mouthed, “out in the trees on the left,” she pointed. “Off their brooms. They have their backs against each other. Watching all four areas. They say you are a great warrior and to be prepared with your take not prisoner tactics. One had fought a war with you, before. Paris…” Sookie’s focus shifted back to him, and she smiled at what she was so obviously hearing.

For a moment, Eric grinned back. “All true,” he smiled at her.  But this was no time for his bullshit! Their lives were at risk, here. “Others?” he asked.

“No,” she shook her head. “Two,” she motioned again and pointed toward the front of the building. “Waiting…and smoking…some type of weed mixed with something…and drinking…something home brewed…they know you trekked this way…they seem to think that you are still in the area…something about…how vampires…” her eyes got rounder as she looked at him… “how vampires leave no trace…no signature…” she shrugged. “A shadow without a shadow…” her attention was fully on him as her eyes flitted over his being. “Yes…” she nodded her head slowly. “The moon loves you and hates them. Never have they seen such a moon so you must be close.”

Then her head was back in the game.  “But they are not sure…things are muddled…disjointed…they keep getting flashes of their own deaths…and the two left are uneasy…and…and…pissing themselves.”

“Where are they exactly?”

“There is an open grove of five trees about one hundred feet to the right of the lot. Not on Sam’s land. They can tell…” her attention once more went elsewhere. “That the land is not his…they are watching the skies…”

“Pamela, would you like to do the honors?”

Grinning, the exceptional child of the world’s greatest maker picked up the butcher knife.

“Take no prisoners,” he saluted her.

“All hail the moon,” she grinned. Then poof! She was gone.

Then she was back. “The area where they sit has been doused with salt. Not of my doing.” With a nod and a two fingered salute to Eric, a bow to the lady under the table, The Viking’s Child in the world’s most expensive shoes was gone without one drop of blood splatter on her.

Eric low crawled his way to the woman under the table. “Eric Northman,” he said extending his hand to her as he stood.

“Sookie Stackhouse,” she replied as she scrambled up with the shot gun tucked under her arm.

“What was that about?” her voice trembled a bit. Certainly nothing that a human would hear, but he did.

“An unholy coven that worships a dark lord. They were looking for me.”

“And an innocent  sacrifice,” she nodded.  “That would have been me. Not been physical on the sphere. Fancy way for saying I am still a virgin. You…you know that about me?”

“Yes,” Eric nodded. “Smell,” was all he said.

Closing her eyes and letting go of a sigh, she straightened her shoulders and continued on. “You did something with your hands.  Looked like you were playing the piano. The movements reminded me of when Gran will play the Hallelujah Chorus.

Are…,” she pointed with her head.  “Are they the ones responsible for those children who have gone missing the past couple of months? The ones that just vanished on their way home from school?”

There was sorrow in her voice. Someone in her life had not come back. “Possibly,” he replied. “I do not know.”

“Are those two dead now?” Her voice was low and pained.

“That I do know and perhaps you do not want too.”

Shrugging she looked back under the table at the tools of her trade for that evening. “I need to get back to work. I was cleaning…when…when they came riding up.”

“Merlotte leaves you here by yourself, to do this?”

Shrugging, she closed her eyes and began, her blue eyes meeting his. “I need the money and he is paying me time and a half. I have been here all day, doing some inventory, throwing out food,  that kind of thing. The moon was bright enough tonight that I thought I could clean the ovens, anywhere there is porcelain.   Just spray on the cleaner and leave. Then I am OCD enough to wipe down the bar so that does not have to be replaced. Get the water up off the floors.  Save Sam some money.”

“Miss Stackhouse, if I might be so bold, there is a fine crop of black mold growing in here. You should not be in here without a full hazmat suit.”

“What?” there was shock in her voice.

“Merlotte knows this. Which is why he is paying you time and a half. As opposed to the thousands of dollars it is going to take to sanitize this building before workers can gut it, in full hazmat.  Bleach down everything, in full hazmat.   And the rebuild is going to cost him a fortune. He would be better off just to burn it to the ground and collect the insurance.”

“What?” There was disbelief and also now anger.

This woman was something, something special. A one-up in a world that was going to Were shit! Magic was magic was magic…but the world was changing. And the magic was changing to keep up. There was a darkness that he was  constantly pushing out at with all his might. This was his new norm. And it was tiring and it pissed him off!  “And he has desires for you and this is how he treats you?”

“I do not listen in on my friends…or try not too,” she sighed. “They called him a shifter…” her voice was low.

“Let’s go someplace we can talk, not in here,” Eric leaned down so that they were eye-to-eye. “For you to be here is a genuine health hazard.”

“Sam told me being with a vampire was a health hazard.”

“He would be correct. But Miss Stackhouse, you seem to come with something extra…an  interesting something extra…something that I would be willing to pay for if you were to use your powers for good for me.”

“Wouldn’t that make them…well you know…I don’t know you…so maybe I would be working for evil as well.”

“True,” he nodded as he took her elbow and propelled her towards the door. “But let us agree, for this moment, that the evil that we just witnessed does not deserve a second chance. Or even a first one.

In Paris, during a blizzard, I ventured into a witch filled bar.  I knew better but my ego insisted that I go out and taunt the ladies. My life that night was saved by a telepath. She was  no one of consequence. Just stood in the shadows of the different doorways trying to keep warm when she was not selling her body for sometimes nothing more than a morsel of food.

I took her from that life. Her work for me was invaluable. With the money I paid her, she became a philanthropist. Destitute women, children, hospitals. All benefited from her generosity. She now has a library in Paris named after her and her name lives on through the ages.

We need someplace to talk. We are both in danger until three. Then starts All Saints Day and their dark power crawls back into the pit for another time.

And Sam warned you of vampires? Do they come here?”

“There is one that moved in across the graveyard from us. A Bill Compton. Gran said his family were yellowbellies during the war and were shunned. He has stopped by the bar for a True Blood.”

Eric stopped and turned to look at her. “Miss Stackhouse, you are a veritable treasure trove of information. Of the type for which I would gladly put you on payroll.”

“Seriously,” she hesitated at the door and her eyes carefully searched his face. “That sounds like a come-on line. I don’t do come-on lines. But I cannot hear your thoughts so that puts me in somewhat of a peaceful, quiet, unheard of…pardon the joke…” she laughed at herself, “situation.”

“Can’t read vampires?” he asked.

“No,” she shook her head. “And I have to tell you, I like the quiet.”

Eric stepped out into the moonlight. He lit up like a golden Viking warrior of old, Sookie thought. Just like the ones you saw in the museum books.

“Her name was Delores,” he continued on.  “The other telepath I knew. She could not read vamps, either.”

“So, what is a shifter?” she asked as they stepped back into the shadows of the building, both listening as they walked towards the woods.

“They can shift to whatever animal they want. Some of them can even skin walk, become different people. They are different from Weres who can only shift to wolf.”

“You mean there are Were wolves, also?” she took a step closer to him, her eyes riveted on his.

“Yes,” Eric nodded.

“So…so Sam could shift to a dog? I mean a small, cute loveable dog?”

“Been one around your house?” Eric asked nonchalantly.

“That ass hole,” she whispered with venom. “This pup comes around every morning at our back door. Has since I started working here when I was sixteen. Looking for handouts. Gran always fixes an extra bowl of oatmeal for him. Thing is, we can’t always afford an extra bowl of oatmeal.”

“Survive this night, Miss Stackhouse, and agree to work for me and money will no longer be a problem for you.”

“What will be a problem for me?” she asked.

“Everything else…Trouble is my middle name. But with you, I could just maybe keep in front of who or what is looking for me.”

They both turned and looked at the same time as two trucks pulled up, with the lights out.

Both trucks were at the end of the parking lot. One was gunning his engine. Tires screeched and the truck roared ahead. Before the truck hit the building, the driver jumped out and landing gracefully on his feet, he  jogged back to the other truck, got in and drove off.

You could feel the impact as the truck hit and the smell of gasoline filled the air. Then smoke.

“As I was saying, the best thing to do would just be to torch it. Where is your car?”

“In the shop. Gran dropped me off earlier. I told her I would call when I was finished. And if I had not called by midnight just to come and get me and honk the horn.

Only I cannot call her now because the building is on fire….” Her voice trailed off.

“You don’t have a cell?”

Sookie just looked at him. There was a faint glimmer of tears in her eyes. “Here,” she gave him a weak smile,  “have a taste of my interpretation of folks Crazy Sookie stare. We have a land line.  That is all we can afford.

Do…do you think they knew I could have been in there?” there was no holding back the tears.

“I think they did not care,” Eric replied as he pulled her up next to him.

“Let me drop you off at home. I am going to check on the Old Compton place and then I will be back to chat you up,” he grinned.

“Okay,” she nodded and then squealed as they were airborne, looking down on the earth.

“Show me where you live,” he whispered in her ear.

“Follow that road,” she giggled back. “And…and…” her voice got more excited as they began to move. “Those lights are town. Those lights to the West are the street lights that take you out of town and out to our house.

See,” he could feel the smile that covered her face, “see the glow of that porch light and that one little tiny light out by the tool shed, that is where I live.”

“Which way is the grave yard?” he asked her as they floated along.

“Look to the right of the tool shed. If you just keep looking right there is a cemetery and just keep looking right and you will see the Old Compton Place.

Oh, you can see it just fine from up here. There…” her voice trailed off. “Some type of vehicle just pulled in.”

“A truck,” Eric hissed. “Miss Stackhouse, take yourself and your shotgun into the house and you can wait for me downstairs. This should take me about….well,” his fangs dropped down over his boyish grin, “not long.”

“Take no prisoners,” she echoed his words from earlier.

“Take no prisoners,” he winked at her, as they floated down, placed her on the porch, watched her go in and listened for her to lock the door. When he heard the deadbolt and her cock the shot gun, his smile got even bigger. “Could be love,” he chuckled to himself as he took off to oversee Billy the Boob’s last ever big mistake.

Landing on the roof,  he sent out the call to his child.

Once he knew she was on her way, he listened to the conversation coming up the chimney. Not very high tech but it was an elegant way of a by-gone era.

“Here is twenty thousand,” he heard Merlotte’s voice. “Another twenty thousand  when the insurance comes through.”

“Pity about the little blonde,” and you could hear the greasy undertones of Bill’s vampire fuck and suck voice.  “In some circles, she would have brought a decent price.”

“Fuck that,” Sam said. “Her working tonight was fucking perfect. Just like there was  a plan. A jealous boyfriend killed her in a rage of despair. Or however they want to piece this together. I will tell them about the part-time job she had in Northman’s fangbanger’s bar. All very hush-hush because she did not want her Gran to know. But I will tell the locals that some guy had been coming around. Throw them off our scent and into Shreveport.

In the morning they will find her bones and with any luck there will be a full-on manhunt for the perp who stole that truck.

What do you think? Was Sookie banging some good looking college boy or was he old and worn out and butt ugly?”

“Somewhere in between,” Bill cautioned. “Just Joe average. Brown hair, brown eyes, six feet. One-eighty, maybe. Could be anyone. Could just be Joe Average that killed her.”

“Or maybe,” Eric grinned as he blew open the door, “Her Nordic god-like lover came to her rescue and it was just dumber that Were Shit and his brother, Dumber and Lower than Were Shit that tried to kill her. Gentlemen, I have good news for you on this All Hallow’s Eve. Miss Sookie yet lives and I can tell you, she makes my heart beat. With my brawn and her telepathic ways, we shall be the next super heros. The Viking Vampire and Perfection.

But for now, it is a take no prisoners kinda scenario. Which is a mercy for you. So my child will not keep you alive for days and torture you.”

Sticking his hands into their chests and lifting both up by their hearts, their feet were dangling off the ground as blood bubbled up out of their mouths.

“Speaking of which. My child is inbound. And I do believe I smell silver chains…and maybe a silver enema or two. You two have been very naughty and probably need your mouths washed out as well.

Ahhh, child,” he looked over and smiled at her as she blew into the house.

“Fuck Eric, you are really the best daddy maker in the world…but fuck, they are just about dead. And I brought my bag of tricks and treats.”

“Make them bleed, child, and take no prisoners.”

“Well fuck, Eric,” she kicked at the floor,” the Shifter just bled out. And there is now a ripe something that is dripping out of his pants.

But Bill,” she sighed. “Just a little extra special something for you. Everyone in the Old World is raving about the Silver Worm. You know, it goes up your willy,” she took out something that resembled a drain snake,  “and crawls its way  through until it hits your brain. Granted that is not a very big target in your case, but the faster I turn the crank, the fast it gets there. And I have people to eat, shoes to shop and Vegas to run. So, I cannot take the time to do this properly. So down and dirty it shall be.”

“Child,” Eric smiled at her as she ripped off Bill’s pants, crushed his voice box and inserted the device. “Take no prisoners. Do Daddy proud. Oh, and burn the place. Start with the bodies.

I feel a storm coming on.”

“Always, my maker,” she batted her eyelashes at him and bending down, began the earnest review of the newest movie she had just seen as William T. Compton, known in vampire circles as Billy the Boob or Lower than Were Shit for Brains, spent his final moments at the hands of one of the most beautiful vampires ever to walk the earth. And they were not good moments, gentle readers. All to ghastly and horrific to take into account, here. But take joy in knowing his silent screams were so fierce that they vibrated the witches that were out riding their brooms, off, and they fell headlong into the unforgiving light circus they had surrounding them.

But on the plus side, the fire that Pamela set was hot, fast and perhaps a bit randy, if a fire could burn with passion and desire. But of course, the flames were set by one of the deadliest vampires to walk the planet, so perhaps, just maybe, the flames devoured the two with a craving and lust it had never felt, before. Go Mistress Pamela!

As Eric walked through the grave yard, he could smell the smoke and burning flesh. Pam always liked a hot fire. She was a girl who knew how to get the job done.

“Don’t want to catch the woods on fire,” he smiled, rubbing his hands together, he felt the wind caress his skin and the sky began to rumble.

“Give me a touch of lightning,” he made the double stack ZZ in the air with his finger. There was a crash and a flash, followed by another, as the rain began.

“Excellent,” he grinned as he approached the house. “Miss Sookie has lit a fire. Definitely my kind of woman.”

Knocking on the front door, Sookie was there immediately and opened it.

“You have to invite me in,” he smiled at her. “Or, we can sit here on the porch and watch it rain and talk. I think all the immediate threats have been neutralized for now.”

“I told Gran,” her eyes never left his. “She said if I wanted to invite you in it was okay. You need to meet her, though. She is waiting for you in the living room…which actually, is just the other side of this door.

Can you agree to that?”

“Yes,” he replied. “And if at anytime I worry you, just say I revoke your invitation. Or better yet,” he took out his cell and dialed a number.

“Samuel my brother,” Eric grinned at the screen. “I need you to chaperone me, this dark.”

There was a soft voice with a slight accent. “Oh to be so blessed, Eric. What is the occasion.”

“I am going to enter the home of one Sookie Stackhouse and her Gran. I told them to revoke my invitation if I worried them. But with you on guard, I know I will do nothing unseemly. And if I do, you must promise to hunt me to the ends of the earth and destroy me.”

Sookie was watching the screen.

The handsome man, smiled. You could see his joy there in his eyes. “Is she the one, my brother? The one your grandmother foretold? The Telepath? Is she blonde? Does she have blue eyes? And most importantly, is she immune to your bullshit?

And of course I will do as you wish,” was said with much fanfare.

“Miss Stackhouse,” the oldest living vampire began with a bow, “I do so promise to uphold this vow. If my brother Eric, does anything he should not and I will be watching,” he stressed,  “I will end his life.”

“Me boy’o,” Samuel was shoved out of the way and there appeared a young man with flaming red hair and a smile that could charm a leprechaun. “Is she the one? I heard the words! A chaperone and the sacred vow we all took to protect this woman that you shall love. Ian,” the ginger turned and shouted across the room. “Are you a’hearin’ this? Eric has found The One!”

“We are in Dallas,” a voice with a very British boarding school accent chimed in. “We could be in-bound in ten minutes. We can chaperone in person. My very dear and ever so charming Miss Stackhouse,” a different face appeared on the screen.  This one with brown hair and matching brown eyes. “Just keep him on the porch until we get there. And if at all possible, we would like to be there when he asks permission to call you by your first name.”

A shout of “Tally Ho!” was sounded out by three distinct male voices and the screen went dead.

“We are going to have company,” Eric said with a small, tight smile on his face. “Do not worry, you will be more than safe. Samuel, my oldest brother is, as far as we know, the oldest living vampire and he was with Moses when his God parted the Red Sea. He is a very devout Jew, my brother.”

“How…how do I know that to be the truth?’ Sookie asked him.

“Miss Stackhouse, I am many things. I delight in lying to my queen; The Vampire Court of the Old World and perhaps on my taxes. But I do not lie to my friends. By all accounts, you helped to save my life tonight. That makes you much more than a stranger or a casual acquaintance.”

“Did…did he really mean those things about your grandmother?”

“My grandmother,” Eric began slowly and carefully. “Was the wise woman of our clan. She was smart and she was mystical. A great spiritual force, and she wore a human that had done it all and had dealt with the good and the unseemly. I loved her with all that I was. And I still do. She spoke many prophecies concerning me. Most of which I have seen come to pass. Perhaps the most spectacular and farthest-fetched was when she dreamed of me in a land far away in a time ages into the future. There would be a woman who would re-define my world and walk side-by-side  with me on the battle field, sword-for-sword. Life-for-life. That she would kill any who thought to destroy me.  That she would become my all and I would gladly give my own life to save hers. All that I have would be hers. To include my soul. That she was just as stubborn and bull head as myself. Would call me on my bullshit and kick my ass to the curb when needed with her sheer strength of will. If you are this woman,  then you are just as fierce as you are beautiful.

Are you asking me if you are that woman? I do not know. But you do live in a land far away from my Viking roots and you are a thousand years in my future. Telepath. Blonde, perhaps, under your turban and your eyes are definitely blue. You know your way around that shot-gun and I would be willing to be you can hunt, clean and then cook your own kill.  I admire that in a woman. Reminds me of my grandmother.

Now, given my long past, that could be one of many girls I know. Except for the telepath, part.”

“I can hear the truth in your words. And also the truth in those of your friends. How dangerous can get this get?” she asked.

“Extremely. Exceedingly.”

Nodding her head as if seeing into the future, her eyes were once more back on him. “What if I turn on you. I get a better offer. I mean, they were looking for you, tonight.”

“Miss Stackhouse, I do not mean to disagree with you, but  I doubt that. I know today’s generation. Self-absorbed; all about the righteous, self-centered me.  Your hands tell me you work for a living. Scars from cuts and one or two from burns. Your right shoulder is just a bit lower than your left. You wait tables. You carry heavy loads balanced on your right shoulder. You are like a warrior who has carried his pack for so long it is second nature to him. Shoulder it and move out, because that is the job. Their body testifies to this. Just like your body testifies. There is no shame and only honor in what you do. You work hard for your daily bread. The only shame  comes to those that would judge you for being so diligent.”

Gran opened the door. “I have been standing here listening, Mr. Northman. I am Adele Stackhouse, Sookie’s gran, please come in.”

“Miss Adele,” he said with a bow. “I thank you for your trust. But sincerely, I would rather wait on the Triad that is inbound. Probably with Clifford, Samuel’s majordomo riding on his back.

Clifford keeps a backpack full of emergency rations for just such an occasion. There shall be nice things to eat while Clifford putters about your kitchen and the boys take full stock of my embarrassment and your granddaughter’s exceptional qualities.”

“Are you blushing?” Sookie asked as she pushed him closer to the porch light.

“That would be very rare if I did,” was his response.

“Your face just got redder, to include the tips of your ears. You said you did not lie to your friends. So this is the deal breaker, what is going on?”

“Not going on, Miss Stackhouse, but what I have not told you is the very last words my grandmother spoke over me while she was dying.”

“Yes,” Sookie made a come-on motion with her hand.

“She told me,” his voice was low and embarrassed, “that this woman that I would love. That we were destined. That because of her, I would understand why the evil ones curse the moon and I dance naked under it.

Evil knows that it fills the night with a calming effect and evil hates the calm.

This is what I have found true to be about you. You are very calm. And in the moonlight, I see things that linger about you.”

Eric was shifting about.  “The boys,” he raised his hands and put them back down.  “They want to meet you so that you know they will always have your back. Because they desire wives, our daughters. Grandmother told me she would have my children and my children would become the soul-mates of my brothers.”

“What?” Sookie took a step back.

Eric gave her a small smile. “So if you are not the one, Miss Stackhouse, just enjoy the show. They will tell you all of my embarrassing moments and possibly lie about a few others.

My brothers,” his voice was earnest, “they are good…men… no longer describes them. But as human, they were the best the world had to offer. They long for those human things they were denied.  And once they experience your goodness and gentle ways, and the serene moonlight that flows from your pores and engulfs all, they are going to want to repose in that peacefulness that surrounds you the rest of their lives. They are going to want that for their own.  I know I do.”

 

 

Dear Readers,

This was my one-shot Halloween story.  Seriously, a one-shot! Please stop laughing, you know I can hear you!

A happy belated Halloween!

I am now selling real estate in Crazy!

Still working on my original fiction.

Have started Christmas….oy vey!

On to the holidays and the Holy Days.

As always, thanks for reading!

Be blessed and be the blessing,

CES

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Epilogue: The Curse of the Eclipsing Blood Moon—Chapter 17

Banner The Curse of the Eclipsing Blood Moon

Epilogue: Chapter 17

The characters of the Southern Vampire Mysteries belong to Miss Charlaine Harris. No infringement on my part is intended. The characters on True Blood belong to Mr. Alan Ball. No infringement on my part is intended.

I have no BETA, editor, or other such charming person. All mistakes are my own. This Story is rated M.

Epilogue:  The Curse of the Eclipsing Blood Moon

Chapter 17

 

 

Bill kept looking at his phone. It would light up from time to time with the Judge’s name as the who was calling. It had been that kind of night.  The phone calls had stared with this new dark and just seemed to keep coming!  “I am just wondering how fucked I am?”

He did not have Sophie-Anne in his possession. He did not have any of her information in his possession. What few codes he had known, she had changed them once the fire had started. So that is where she had disappeared too. Just fuck the luck!  Obviously, she did not worry about scorching her own skin, oh no, not her! She was more concerned with her money than getting her own people out!  What kind of queen was she! Selfish bitch! That is what she was! It really was all about her!

Fuck!

So here he was…he had taken every precaution he could think of…actually dug a hole in the ground in a cemetery so it was concentrated ground and covered himself up. He might still be awake but you would not bleed if you were buried in your own dirt. That is why he had high-tailed it home. Went over to the grave yard that was a bit on their property line and hunkered down, waiting for what he did not know. But if it was Armageddon, he was not going to be the sacrifice that made it happen.

And every time his phone would ring, it would sound like tasty snack, tasty snack, tasty snack…

When Bill had ignored the call for the 5thtime he closed his eyes and willed himself to sleep. He was a vampire, he should be sleeping,  not answering a phone! Of course, that did not explain the phone calls he had ignored since the new dark.

“Momma,” he cried out in anguish, “Momma, please talk to Jesus. Please tell him I was kidding when I told that foul creature he could have my soul in exchange for glory and gold here on earth! Momma you know I am your good boy,” he sobbed, “please Momma, I need you to be speakin’ to the angles and tell them I was only foolin.” His tears mingled with the dirt, making a mess all over his face and his shirt. It was time to rest. Sleep! The blessed relief was taking over, as he shut off his phone and slipped away to the sound of baying hounds.

 

It was still morning, a quiet time here on Earth. The sun just cresting the horizon, the birds waking up and singing, evil thinking it could walk one more day.

Gabriel slowed down the truck on Hummingbird Lane and called out to the Hell Hounds. “Hey good boys,” she grinned and tossed them both a snack. “I have some digging I need you to do for me.”

The both sat and wagged their tails so hard they began to lift up off the ground.

“I just got us some work!  One William T. Compton has asked his Momma to talk to the Boss Man. And you know what she did?”

“Ooo-o-o-o-OOOOO!” they both laughed.

“That is correct,” Gabriel tossed all six heads another snack. “She  told Him that  she has been watching that no good son of hers and to take his ass straight to Hell. Fortunately, Boss Man feels the same way. So let’s dig him up and haul his ass out into the light and into the back of my trash truck. Judas would love to have the company.

You should be able to smell Bill’s blood from here. And we don’t want him to burn in the light, so you know, dog slobber all over him and then haul his ass out. We want him upright and walking on his own two feet so you chase him into the back of hm-h-h-h-h…what was it Judas used to call the back of my trash truck?  Oh, that’s right, Sanctuary,” she chuckled as she watched six noses go up into the air, the baying started and the search was on!

Bill could hear them…the hounds of hell howling in the distance! Somehow, he knew they were coming for him! Fear gripped him when a howl went off over his grave and then he heard the pawing…someone or thing was removing the dirt at a high rate of speed with a lot of growling and low rumbling from deep with the pits of hell fire!

Frantically, he was trying to dig deeper when the first paw hit him and he screamed when a head appeared, then another, then another! All three mouths grabbed him and pulled him up onto the top of the dirt, shredding his clothes in the process until he had on nothing!

Then they began to vomit…great vast quantities of regurgitated   yuck covered him!

The smell was over whelming as the slime crawled over him and into every crease, crack and crevasse! He began to wretch himself! Blood spewing out and covering his body and the ground! The gore was horrifying! That surely had not all come out of him!

That just seemed to excite the dog even more as he was pulled out by his hair and into the light….and then the terror and the shakes set in, there was another one! Two hell hounds! This was a nightmare! He was surely in his down time, somewhere lost between the two worlds of fear and anxiety that was eating away at his brain! He was here in the sun and not burning! This had to be a nightmare because this could not be real.

“Seriously,” he heard the female’s voice, “you are not good or righteous and not even worthy of being the boys’ meal. They just want to play with you…you know remove a few limbs for all of eternity so that you will always be easy prey and a meal for those that are feeble but faster than you.”

“What?” he tried to rise but a paw was placed on his chest and he was once more anchored in the bloody mulch that had once been him!

“Hell bound you are, Billy Boy. When you deal yourself into the Fallen’s network, well, there are serious consequences to pay. Especially when you try to take down an innocent. Handing Miss Sookie over to Leroy…bad mistake. Thinking you would have bragging rights for killing The Viking was just wrong on so many levels.  So it will not be the Hallelujah chorus that will be welcoming you,  just screams of pain. The loudest will be your own.”

“You cannot judge me,” Bill yelled. “I have rights. My momma had me baptized in  Back Creek. Preacher came especially that Sunday just for me. We had fried chicken and sweetened rhubarb with our cornbread and a lemon meringue pie to celebrate the occasion. I am sanctified in the eyes of God.”

“Not my God,” she smiled at him as the hound removed the paw from his chest and Gabriel grabbed him by the legs and began pulling him along the ground.

As he bumped along, he screamed every obscenity he knew, demanding to be heard by someone other than a lackey!

“And,” he managed to get out. “I am still alive. You cannot cast me to anywhere while I yet live.”

Gabriel stopped and turned to look at him. “You met the true death when you vomited out your insides.”

“What?” he looked up at her.

“Yes,” she nodded. “The pups thought they could have a little fun with you but you got so scared you vomited out all of your blood and that ended your sad and disgusting life.”

“What?” he gasped out.

“Judgement day, Mr. Compton, has arrived. I am merely the currier. You will accompany me to your final destination.”

“But…but…”

“Well, there are a few who live in the back of my trash truck where the glory of God shines on them nonstop. They prefer this to Hell. I cannot imagine why.”

“That is what I want,” he yelled at her and shook his fist. “That it was I deserve! The glory of God. Cast me into hell I think not. A trash truck was nowhere in my Sunday School lesson so I think that is just all made up. But I know the glory of God is real. So take me,” he snarked, “to my reward. For I am deserving.”

“Will do,” she smiled.

As they approached the back of the truck, Bill could hear the cursing and screams of agony!

“They must be unworthy to be in the presence of all that glory,” Bill chuckled. “I shall ride there until she stops in Heaven and I will get out there.”

The back opened and the smell was worse than that of the dogs came spilling out.

“Fresh meat,” she yelled as she picked him up and tossed him in.

Bill felt the claws and teeth of something not quite human rip into him and a burning that seared him!

Screaming, The Light penetrated every part of him. His cells exploded with pain! Even the cells that made up the hair on his body, his toe nails and finger nails! There was no place The Light did not penetrate.

“What is it that consumes me?” he screamed as he was being feasted upon.

“The glory of God,” he heard whispered in his ear before it was eaten, off. Judas could not keep his mouth shut even filled with this fresh meat, he must, talk. It was an addiction! He must always speak and spread the gospel of Judas. “Feasting on you makes me even more ravenous, friend. If I flip you over, thusly, I see  there are no scorch marks on your ass yet! Excellent. You really are fresh!  Let’s see if you taste any better in a bit of a more awkward position. Because your front tastes like the floor of this trash truck. And friend, the slime that resides there is from the beginning of time. You would think  it would ferment and become wine. Why, I remember at a wedding when I changed water into wine. And I keep working this venue, but it still just taste like thousands of years rotting corpses.”

And thusly ended William T. Compton. Riding in the back of a trash truck that made the rounds on earth and dropped the damned in Hell. This is where the unholy would catch a ride but never loiter. They preferred the tortures of Hell to the insanity that lingered in the back of that truck! The Light that baked them was bad enough, but the bullshit that flowed from Judas and Bill was enough to make you want to get off in the worst part of Hell! It was not unusual for Gabriel to hear pounding on the back with screams of “Please, get me the fuck out of here! Just pull over anywhere! These two are just fucking nuts! And I thought I was fucking nuts! I am sane compared to these two! Sane enough to know that the fiery furnace and every demon in Hell chewing on me is preferred to their company!”

 

 

It was quiet at the club. The humans were sleeping for a couple of hours after the noon time repast. And it had been a feast!

“Are we going to open for business, tonight?” Pam asked. “I need to know what to tell folks that are going to be clocking in.”

“Tell them to stay home. We will pay their hourly wage but we are having a special event, tonight.

Put that out on our social-media feed as well. Fantasiais closed. We will be back in the biz on Wednesday night.”

“Will do,” Pam nodded and took out her phone and began spreading the word about not coming to work.

“They are still out there, close,” Ian remarked.

“Yes, they are,” Eric nodded. “I wonder just what it is they are waiting for?”

 

 

 

 

“Are you sure you gave the pizza delivery guy this address?” Cacius whined. “I am starving! And I want food. And I want pizza and beer!”

“I told you, they are on their way. And  I don’t  this gas station is going to let us sit out here and drink beer, even if we did purchase it from them. We are going to have to go someplace else. They have other customers to think about. Like soccer moms with their kids and the neighbors’ kids and the kids on the team.

Sitting out here and drinking, that is called public intoxication and they will put us in cuffs, place us in the back of a cruiser and haul us off to be processed.

Okay, there is the pizza car. You stay here! I will pay and we will be on our way. We will find a place to park close to the club and we will eat.”

“Damn I have the munchies,” Cacius groused. “And I want ice cream! A whole cow’s worth. And something salty! And…and…fries with a cherry coke, whatever the fuck that is. But this body had it once when it was younger and delighted in it so, he refused to ever have it again, it was such a temptation! I say, lets us be tempted! Let us tempt everyone! For it is better to rule with me in the darkness than to live in the light without catsup! And secret sauce! And I do not know what chocolate is, but I want all of it!”

Leroy got back in the car with two boxes of pizza.

“What is chocolate?” Cacius asked as he opened the top box, inhaled deeply and then picked up a piece and began to eat.

“Wait one,” Leroy nodded and went back into the Quickie Mart.

The bag he was carrying back out was bumping against his leg. Cacius started laughing. The Judge was humping a plastic sack!

“This,” Leroy got in and dug around in the bag and held up a plastic container with a pop-open top, “is chocolate. You can put it in milk, or on ice cream, or just pop open the top, put it to your lips and suck.”

“Oh-h-h-h-h,” Cacius sighed as his lips attached and the nectar flowed. “Better than momma’s milk,” he said smacking his lips and began to suckle, again.

“That should keep him quiet,” Leroy smiled to himself.  “Let me just get to Fangtasia,park, eat something, then get on with my soon to be kingdom.”

“Pass me a piece of pizza…” he said reaching over and lifted the top off. “What the fuck! You ate one entire pizza by yourself? Seriously! You pig!”

“Whatever…” Cacius said taking his mouth away from the syrupy goodness. Licking his lips, he unscrewed the top and guzzled the liquid. “Better than eating between a woman’s legs,” he sighed as it ran down his chin and dripped onto his robe.

“Pig,” Leroy said with disdain. “And this is my car. You are going to pay to have it detailed.”

“I will be their god,” he smiled and licked his lips, then pulling up the cloth he suckled on the chocolate there, as well. “You can have whatever the fuck you want.

Is there another bottle?” he asked rooting around in the bag.

“Damn, you finish that one?”

“Well yes, that was just very fine. So is there another?”

“Yes,” Leroy rolled his eyes. “Down there in the bottom someplace. And be careful with the potato chips. Kettle cooked are my favorite. And we have to get going. I want to park behind those trees that we spotted in their back forty. Get the lay of the land and then storm the castle. All the vamps should be down. Any humans and I will just shoot them.

You are sure you are capable of finding where the vamps bed down?”

“Yes, of course, the magic dust and this ice cream just enhances my super natural powers. I feel like I could star walk in this body! Fu-u-u-u-k what a feeling! Power running down my legs and out into the universe!”

“That is piss you moron! You just pissed in my car!”

“You will be king and I will be your god and you can have whatever the fuck you want,” he grinned. “I am going to have that tattooed onto your forehead so that every time you look in a mirror,” Cacius threw a spoon of ice cream at him, “you will see it!” he yelled. “Stop criticizing me! I am a god! I can do whatever the fuck I want!

“You shit in my car,” Leroy growled, “and I am hauling your ass down into the river and weighing you down with rocks.”

“You ungrateful maggot,” he began to weep. “I am just learning to abide in this body and all you do is rebuke me.”

“Justifiably so,” he replied.

Cacius sobbed for a bit and then they drove along in silence, for which Leroy was grateful. Here came the club.  Leroy did a careful look over of Fangtasia’s front parking lot and smiled when he saw it was empty.  Then he drove around to the back, took note of his surroundings and then continued on down the road to the trees. Parking, he shut off the engine.

“All is quiet and I am feeling a lot better about this. Now hand over the bag of goodies. And those kettle chips had better be unopened.”

Cacius handed him the sack and Leroy picked up the chip bag that was still on top.

“Fuck,” he hissed as he looked in the bag. “You ate those during that time you had stopped talking, didn’t you! That was why you were so fucking quiet! I should have known. You cannot fucking stop running at the mouth and then you go quiet. I just fucking should have known.”

“I was hungry and you were driving,” was his curt reply. “You are very concerned about your auto. I am just helping you keep it neat and tidy.”

“You little fucker…” Leroy yelled and threw the empty bag at him.

“No need to be mean. It is not my fault that I am not amply endowed.”

“What?” Leroy eyed him. “Then, oh-h-h-h, left them wanting did you?”

“Left me wanting more,” Cacius grinned.  “Now, what else is in the bag?”

 

 

“What the fuck?” Pam asked as she looked up from the monitor. “I mean, just what the fuck? They have sat out there for an hour!”

“They have the munchies,” Lafayette replied. “I suspects they has been high rollin’ in some unrighteous poisons. Can you zooms in?” he asked.

“Of course,” she eyed Lafayette as she moved her finger across the screen on her phone.

“Covered in the magical and mystical shits that is white. Do nots be knowin’ which powder that is for sure, but it cannot be good.”

“When do you think they are coming inside?” Gran asked.

“Cannot for sure be sayin’,” Lafayette shrugged his shoulders.

“I am thinking that when it gets dark they are going to know that they need either the same plan or a new plan,” Eric was watching them inside the car. “Cacius is filthy,” he shook his head in disgust. “Looks like maybe he has blood in his hair and something covering the front of his body. I don’t want him walking in here like that. I think it is time for some rain.”

“You can do that?” Sookie eyed him. “Wait one, of course you can,” she grinned. “My man is not without his own brand of magic.”

“Damn straight,” he winked at her, licked his lower lip and mouthed “straight and hard.”

Rubbing his hands together he began by stirring the winds and swirling around the humidity.

“I can feel the pressure dropping,” Ian nodded.

“Get ready,” Eric grinned, “for tropical storm you are so fucked. But clean before you come into my place of business.

Lover, are you ready?” he looked over at Sookie.

“Get the rain started and then bring them in.”

 

“Where did this storm come from?” Leroy asked as the lightning    sparked the rain showing each drop and thunder shook the leaves off the trees.

“I did this,” Cacius snarked, “just to show you what I am capable of. So do not ever mock me, again.”

“Well damn, can you make it slow down for a moment?”

“No,” he smiled. “Now, drive us around to the front of the building and park under the portico.”

“Have you lost your mind?” the judge scowled. “No. We get in and get out. I am sure they have security cameras and probably store that on the cloud. My license plate is not coming up on a police blotter. Now get your ass in gear. We are going to make a run for the back door.”

Cacius made a sound of disgust. “So you don’t think they don’t have a camera back here?”

“Oh, I am sure they do. So keep your head down and run.”

“You do not look that strong to me,” Cacius quipped, “have you magic after all to open that door?”

Leroy laughed as he reached under his seat and took out a very large pistol. “Magic, you bet, in the form of this Desert Eagle. I call him Dirty Harry,” he said patting the pistol fondly. “As a judge I just never know when I am going to need to protect myself from the underbelly of humanity,” he laughed out loud. “Actually, this storm is perfect,” he winked at Cacius.  “I am blasting my way through the back door. And if any human is in unfortunate enough to be there, Dirty Harry will persuade them to direct us to the vamps  and then those vamp lovers are dead as well.

So get ready to run,” he said opening his car door. “It is time to rule the world!”

 

“He has gots him some serious fire powers,” Lafayette said.

“Our back door is going to take a serious hit,” Pam frowned. “Can these fuckers just come to the front door and knock? It would sure make things easier. That door cost a fortune.”

“And what is he going to do,” Eric chuckled, “when he finds out he cannot blast through?”

“No,” Pam shook her head. “Just no!”

“Paris all over again, aye, me boy’o,” Cedric laughed.

“Looks like,” Eric sighed. “Damn but oh well…” Eric shrugged as they heard the gun blast hit the door lock. “Door is done, anyway. Cannot very well have the health inspector seeing bullet holes in the back door.”

 

“What the fuck?” Leroy began cursing. “This gun can take down an elephant!  What is this lock made out of?”

“Step back, and let a god do this, you nitwit. Sometimes you need a bigger brute force. We shall use the power of  nature! Stand back and take cover.”

“How far back?”

“Shrapnel will probably be present, so maybe off to the side.”

“Well, I cannot possible get anymore more soaked then I am already, so let her rip.”

 

“Sookie you are on,” Eric bowed to her.

“Okay, I am watchin’ this asshole’s hands. Here he goes, he is raisin’ them and ka-pow!” she threw her hands out and on the monitor they all saw the lightning strike as the door blew inward.

“Fuck,” Pam hissed and stomped her foot. “Wall damage as well, not to mention the rain blowing in.”

“Once they step inside we shall dispense with the downpour,” Eric said as the two pushed aside what remained of the metal and walked into the hall. “Now,” Eric breathed out. “We could use just a gentle rain. Still some thunder and lightning, but not the hurricane force winds.

Better,” he grinned as he heard the wind subside. “Now, places everyone, the show is about to start.”

 

Carefully they stepped into the building.

“Did you see that?” Cacius crowed! “I mean did you see it! Smell that ozone! Look at the door hinge. That metal is still glowing it is so hot! I have it! I really have the power! No one is going to stand in our way. I am going to be a god,” he laughed and then wept. “A god, finally. After all this time, my diligence and perseverance and believing in myself has finally paid off. I am going to rule and the first thing I am going to do is…is…well, have all that lovely cocaine brought to me and I am going to bathe in it!”

“Carnal delights,” Leroy sadly shook his head. “You know, I learned that back in the day. Somethings are better than getting your dick sucked.”

“Really?” Cacius turned and looked at him. “And what would that be?”

“Being the one in charge. Writing the rules and making the laws. Taking what you want when you want it. Power. I mean absolute and forever.”

“Spoken like a broken man,” Cacius sniffed and shook all over and wiped at his hair. “Longing for something you have always wanted and been denied. From the very beginning, you were lacking and yet I allowed you to continue.”

“Do not tell me what my early years were like on earth. I lived those. Every fucking one of them in that village with that self-righteous little blonde shit and her warrior king! I want to feast on them when you get your god powers up and running!  Pull them out of Valhalla or where ever the fuck they went.”

“Oh, so now you want specific things,” Cacius laughed.

“Do not smirk at me, while you rested up in the stars, by body has been slammed back onto earth at your whim. Well, oh clueless one and sex and drug addict, find out for yourself what living here is like. You now own that body so I would be very good to it. And you look fucking ridiculous soaked to the skin in that white robe. Just shows how little you have and where.”

“Be careful I do not unleash the lightning on you,” he hissed, “and set  you on fire. Then I will put you back together all wrong. I will put your dick in the middle of your forehead. And your anus where your mouth is while you are a toasted raw steaming mess!”

 

 

Sookie looked around at the crowd. “That sounds ominous. And dangerous and just downright nasty. Who would say that to anyone?”

“Apparently Cacius and the Old One either mix very well or not at all,” Gran remarked. “Or maybe they have both just been peddling  bullshit for so long neither one no longer remembers their original construct or powers or whatever they thought their manifest destiny was going to be or should be.”

“Or maybe they were both just assholes to start with,” Eric added. “We have established like is drawn to like. And no matter how much you shake things around, oil does not mix with water.”

“You think they are going to self-destruct?” Ian asked.

“Not in Fangtasia,” Eric responded watching the monitor. “I do not want to clean up their mess. So let us move this along. If we could keep it all behind the closed door, I would love that. But that probably is not going to happen. So places everyone and let us get this done.

Pamela, if you would please, kill all the lights and let us see what happens next.”

 

“What the fuck just happened?” Leroy asked. “Did you do that?”

“You mean turn out the lights?” Cacius screeched. “No!”

“I mean, with your lightning bolt, did you fry some electrical wiring and blow the circuits?”

“Oh,” Cacius replied in a bit lower and less fearful voice. “I don’t know? Maybe? All this power unleashed,” the bravado was back, “hard to say.”

“Well can you provide some light? And I don’t hear anyone yelling to turn the lights back on. So I am guessing no humans. So how do we find the vamps in the dark? And we are not even out front yet,” he said, taking out his phone and hitting the flashlight.

The door ahead of them opened by itself and you could see blue dancing lights hovering, zipping about and sharing the space where a light bulb was, showering the area around it with what looked like a blue sparkler.

“Impressive,” Leroy swiveled his head and said to Cacius with a smile. “Damned impressive.”

“Thank you,” he smiled in return. “I believe with my magic, we will be able to find the vampires.”

“Well, we need to get a move on this. Daylight is soon going to be turning into darkness. Can you defeat a vamp?”

Cacius preened. “I found it doubtful that an undead can survive a lightning blast. We can proceed. Some caution, of course, but just look at this ceiling,” his eyes began traveling around the hall. “And to think humans actually did the carving on it,” he let out a low whistle. “So perhaps your species has some use after all.”

Leroy was in front and his step did not falter. “So this fucker thinks he is taking out my subjects. We shall see. He seems to forget that he wears a human body as well.

I thought you were in here for a meeting before all this started?” he said.

“Yes, but that human could not appreciate what was before him. Small man with a small mind. And sadly, a small penis.

But this, this is a deft hand and an artist with the gift. Do you see this demon carved here on the end, truly, I think I know that fellow. It’s the eyes and the fangs and the way his claws are holding that skull. Looks exactly like Hubertus.

My word, and I do mean my word,” he grinned at his own private joke, “I recognize all these fine fellows that are carved in here. What a fabulous place. This shall become my new home.

Let us find the bar. And while we are there, pour me something Leroy. I think this calls for a celebration.”

“You want something to drink?” the judge said in disbelief. “We need to find these vampires and destroy them. Evening is coming.”

“You have such a small mind and spirit, Leroy,” Cacius said turning to face him. “Now let me tell you about my mind and spirit. I am far reaching and all encompassing. I am prepared. Always. I see the future and the past and I am more than you shall ever be. I was there at the beginning and I watched as Satan fell and it was glorious! Sincerely, I might have been stuck in the ether but I watched as the fabulous fallen fuckers…fabulous fallen fuckers…fabulous fallen fuckers…”

“Cacius…Cacius,” Leroy moved in closer as Cacius kept chanting those last three words. “Are you all right? What is going on?”

 

The Scooby Gang was on their headsets and watching their monitor. “What the fuck, His La La Fineness wants to know, is going on? Did his head just do a complete 360? And the contortions  the rest of his body is going through.”

“Look at his pupils’,” Ian whispered. “They are bugging out.  And the way the top of his scalp is moving. He’s blowing out the synapsis in his brain.”

Eric was watching the monitor. “He is on overload. The drugs have cooked the body. What the fuck is that stuff oozing out of his facial orifices?

Magics, you are now on alert. I would not engage this fucker until we know just exactly what he is. Let us handle this…and if it goes south, go inert!

Gran, you need to shelter.”

“Hell no,” she gave Eric the stink-eye. “The Holy Spirit that dwells in me is more than any evil that the bowels of Hell can vomit out. I have lived that gospel my entire life. I am not running now!

Grand-daughter, hand me one of your special swords. It is game on!”

“Livin’ the spirit she is, our Gran,” O.I. grinned.

“And maybe a bit of the dragon blood,” Adele high-fived O.I. and both shouted “mo’ fo’n!”

“The official battle cry,” Lafayette nodded in agreement. “Miss Sooks, some swords that come bathed in The Blood, if you will please!”

“On that,” she grinned and an array of battle paraphernalia

appeared. “Oh-h-h-h-h,” was chuckled by the ladies. “Girly armor. Look how those links sparkle! Is that paved?” Gran asked.

“Blown in by the mind of God,” Lafayette smiled as he picked a chain mail shirt up. “And light as an angel’s feather!”

“Gear up,” Eric’s voice was quiet. “Leroy does not know it yet, but I believe he is going to be Cacius’ next meal.”

 

“I wonder if all these doors in this hall are the same as the outside one,” Leroy tapped Pamela’s office door with his pistol.

Turning he saw the new and improved Cacius.  “What…what the fuck?” he whispered in fear as he saw green ooze seeping from all the orifices on his face.

“Seems I am merging with the universe,” he grinned and his jaw dropped open and his teeth grew longer and very pointed.

“I can see by the look on your face I am reverting back to my true nature. Pity, this body may not be handsome but it has several things going for it.”

“Have you always looked like that?” his voice quivered.

“You mean before The Fall, no. I got into a sword fight with an angelic who was a bit more than I was. Not only was there hacking and slashing involved, but apparently I was cursed to this form as well. I found living in the ether, I could take on a more pleasant form, which is how I recruited you. I mean, seriously, no one wants to sell their soul to anything that even faintly resembles me.

You were so willing, Leroy, you begged and whined and wanted and wished for and sliced your own wrists so that I might taste your blood and accept it as a sacrifice. You were so sweet and so desperate and so willing. I like meals that are willing,” he grinned as green puss dribbled down his chin. “And ones that beg and whine and want and wish for death. You can live in my belly and help nourish me and give me something to laugh about whenever things get a little too serious.”

“No,” Leroy turned and opened fire on what was left of the human construct.

“Should have killed me when you had the chance. With the change, I am unstoppable by the likes of your weak human ways. Now where was I, oh yes, a meal.”

 

“That,” Pam pointed at the monitor, “is just disgusting. And somewhat horrifying. I mean, will we ever get that green goo to come out whatever it touches. This moron has no idea how much those we clean until it is spanky new folks charge. And this is some type of cosmic bio clean up. Damn, I am never going to show a profit for the month of October!”

“Now that’s interesting,” Ian said leaning in closer to the monitor, “he is puking up Leroy and making little demon Leroy’s. So I guess we all get a whack at one.”

“Not enough of his Leroy fuckedupness to make a Leigon,” O.I. sighed. “That is just sads. Once I flame on, all those mo fo’ers just might pass on to judgement. For goods!”

“Do not,” Gran eyed him, “take out more than your fair share,” she shook her finger at him. “We all want bragging rights.”

“Man,” Sookie chuckled, “he should have let Leroy live a bit longer. Look at him, not one clue about how to make things happen. He is trying to use the gun to blast his way through the door. Does not know the first thing about how to use it.”

“Just keeps pullin’ the trigger, expectin’ the bullets to come out. That boy’o is dumber than Were shit,” Cedric snickered. “And I am seein’ what you mean about the cleanup, Mistress Pamela, looks to be snot everywhere. And that snot just forms another dumber than Were shit Leroy…only round  and has no legs and…and…is that his dick that is dragging on the floor? Woof! Green slime or not, that is just damned impressive. Look, they are pushing themselves along with that thing.”
“Can I see?” King Eric asked, the voice muffled in Eric’s pants.  “I cannot believe anyone is more robust than myself!” he said in disbelief.

“What?” Gran looked over at Eric’s crotch. “Your penis talks?”

“Yes, at all the wrong times,” Eric snarled and slapped the front of his crotch. “We are to war, so grab a knife and be at the ready,” Eric said to him.

“Ouch, you big oaf,” was yelled back in a Swedish accent. “I should just let them gut you, but alas, it would be my ending as well. So to war and we shall table this discussion for a later time.”

“He talks,” Sookie smiled at Gran.

Eric just shrugged his shoulders and grinned. “Yes. And at all the wrong times.

So, less about King Eric and more about the problem at hand. Gear up! We are to war!”

 

There was a pounding on the door! Kicks and yells and screams! Cursing and cussing and swearing!

“Is he really that stupid?” Sookie asked. “I mean, seriously?”

“Do not, Grand-daughter, confuse Hollywood’s version of evil with evil. Not all knowing, or all powerful, or smart. Between all of them, they do not have one complete brain between them. Just how many doors did they pass and one of them takes you to the kitchen. From the kitchen you can access this area.

But on the other hand, this is pretty good entertainment. Look at those blob things, trying to stand on top of each other so they can make a green snot snowman…or something…” she rolled her eyes. “And knocking each other around and out of the way with their…yes, those have got to be a penises.”

“They can play pool all by themselves,” Lafayette said. “You know, they comes as a cue ball and their own stick.”

“That is a good thought. I could label it an inter-dimension billiards game. I bet Vegas would bet on that,” Pam looked intrigued. “Maybe I’ll send along the videos…” Her voice trailed off as Eric arched an eyebrow at her. “Or not…so Boss Man, next move?”

“Take your magic and places everyone. I am going to open the door.  Pamela is correct, they will be coming down the hall passage. And the magic that lives back there is starting to yell at me in my ear piece.”

 

“Do you see my power and might!” Cacius bellowed, “did you see that! I command the door to open and so it did! It obeys me as all things must. I am ruling this planet and all shall bow and worship and I shall be their god.”

He began to weep as all the green blob Leroys circled around him and threw snot on him! “We listen and obey and share in the goodness!” the round Leroys shouted as they danced about on the tip of their penis.”

 

“Pogo stick,” Sookie was doing her best to remain tactical but was finding it difficult to do so.  “Please, someone make a noise, like you are something yummy to eat. Get them out here. They keep this up, I am going to pee my pants!”

 

“Reeee, reeeeeee, reeeeeeeee,” pig sounds started from behind the bar.

“That O.I. and Lafayette,” Sookie chuckled as she looked over at Eric. They were perched up by the gargoyles. “And Gran, would you hear her yelling bacon! Like that woman did not have a heart attack just a couple of months ago.”

Eric smiled at her.

“This building is beautiful. The view from up here is stunning,” Sookie sighed. “Your attention to detail is outstanding. The crown molding is actually carved with gargoyles on it.”

“Have to carry the theme and keep everyone happy,” Eric winked at her. “So tell me Sookie, am I keeping you happy?”

“What do you mean?” she looked over at him. “I am going to have a family. Eric that is all I have ever wanted. Someone to love and someone who loved me in return. Babies…I never dared to dream of babies.

You really want to marry me?”

“Right now,” he said taking both of her hands. “This minute. So let us end these cocksuckers and get on with our love.”

“I would like that,” she brought his hand to her lips and kissed it.

“Then let us make it so.”

There, in his eyes, she could see it. The love, the devotion, the dedication…the truth of his words…the truth of his heart.

“I love you,” he kissed her gently. “And you and my heir stay here and watch.”

“What?” she hissed at him.

“I might toss one up to you, but you watch from your lovely perch and enjoy the show.”

Eric placed his hand on her breast, kissed her, and was gone.

“That sneak,” she huffed and then grinned. The snot crew was making its way to the bar. “Pogo sticks,” she chuckled to herself and settled in with the gargoyles to watch the show.

 

Lafayette, Gran, O.I., and now joined by Brother Samuel were behind the bar.

“Don’t have the times to do frozen,” Lafayette smiled, “so we shall just do shaken and not stirred. Give mes the blue agave and Brother Samuel, you have the extra special magic ingredient, let us starts rimmin’ glasses. These mo’ fo’er are about to meet the righteous side of God. No magics required.”

“No magics required,” O.I. laughed so hard he flamed. “Just the goodness The Light has provided here on Earth.”

 

“Drinks!” Cacius yelled at the bar.

And just like that, drinks appeared!

“Did you see that!” he yelled and beat his fist up in the air. “Magic, my magic, pure, sweet and simple. All must obey me! All! Yes! I am god and I shall be god and I shall always be god!

And look at this lovely green color of this alcohol! Exactly your color Leroys. Come and drink and partake of my generosity and over flowing  heart. We shall toast the new regime and then drink.”

Cacius was busy passing out the drinks.

All the blobs thought their big and mighty penis was a handy thing to have. Not only did it act as a leg, a hand, or a place to house your brain, it also acted as a straw.

“Here is to me, the new god! I shall reign forever! Now bottom’s up,” he raised his glass in a salute. The Leroys did likewise and the set the glass down on the floor and all drank.

 

“Wait for it,” Samuel smiled into his mic. “In 5,4,3,2,1…and we are a go for slime.”

“Like putting salt on a slug,” Gran said standing up and watching.

“Exactly like that,” Samuel grinned. “Especially when the salt comes from the Dead Sea and has been blessed by Saul and Miriam Levi. Owners of one of the best deli’s in New York.”

“Ouch,” Sookie floated down with Eric and watched the floor show. “Literally. You can watch the salt coursing through Cacius. That does not look pleasant. And I would love a Margaretta, but I guess not. No alcohol or caffeine for me for the next nine months.”

“We are all in agreement about that,” Gran nodded. “And yes, the blue agave sounds mighty good. I watched Lafayette add his little something extra special.”

“You mean that can of beer?” Sookie grinned.

“Makes it goods, better, bestest,” O.I. nodded, finished his glass and pushed it towards Lafayette for a refill.

“Well, there goes the last of Cacius,” Ian said making a face. “Woof! Grave roof rot smells better.”

“He looks like an old dried out brown booger. Woof…just nasty.”

“He has been fermenting since the fall from Heaven,” Gran nodded. “Can not get much ripper than that.”

“Pam, call in Natchez and her coven of six…tell her to bring everything she has got to clean this mess up. That includes her sister’s coven as well. Pay her whatever she wants.”

“On that,” she nodded. “Hope these fuckers do not permanently stain our rock floors. I know we had them sealed and blessed, but still, yuck!”

“Let’s go home,” Eric wrapped Sookie in his arms.

“Home sounds the very best of all,” Sookie tip-toed up and kissed him. “The very best of all.”

Pam looked over at Cedric. “Irish, you staying here with me, or are you going to the house.”

“O’, I am a stayin’ lass. We’ll travel to the house, together.”

 

 

Pam opened the front door to let the cleaning crew in.

“Hi,” the tall woman greeted her. “Natchez told me you had plasma snot that had been dosed with blessed salt all over your building. You know she has an allergic reaction to the salt, so she sent me instead. Do not worry, we do an excellent job. You pay us according to our clean up and how much it is worth to you.”

“Who do I make the check out too?” Pam asked.

“St. Michael’s Hospital.”

“That the one that takes kids for free, specializing in cancer treatments.”

“That is the one,” she nodded.

“Will do,” Pam nodded. “And if they ask, who do I say is making the donation?”

“Gabriel’s Cleaning Service.”

Pam stood looking at the woman, intently. “Especially a tall, beautiful, woman. I never forget a face. I have seen you someplace, before.”

“Probably. We clean up the messes no one else wants. If you need brain matter cleaned out of your floor grout, we are the *pros from Dover.”

“Cute,” Pam smiled. “I’ll be in my office. Let me know when you are finished.”

“Can do,” she nodded. “I’ll get the crew.

Zeke, Ray, Mikey. Back the truck up and hook up the equipment. It is looking like Hell melted all over their floor.”

 

Pam can hear the crew making jokes and running their vacuums. She spent the next hour wondering where she had seen the woman, before.

“Cedric, that woman, the tall beautiful one, do you recognize her? From anywhere?’

“No, why?” he asked.

Gabriel stuck her head in the door. “We are finished. Take a look around and write the check. We have to move on. Got another call.”

“Will do,” Pam said. “We’ll do the walk through now and I will post it tonight.”

“Great thanks,” she smiled and was gone.

 

“Come on, let’s do the walk  and go home.”

“Clean,” Cedric said once they stepped out into the hall.

“Very clean. I wonder if they work internationally?”

“Hm-m-m, yes,” Pam gave it a glance. “She certainly seems familiar. I have seen her before. Reminds me of a dream.”

“Really?” he gave her a quizzical look. “That sounds like a memory pushing through from when you were human.”

“Well,” Pam rolled her eyes at him, “that would make her…” and her voice trailed off.

“From when I was human.”

Vamp speed she was gone and caught up with the crew at the trash truck.

“I know you,” Pam wiped the tears from her eyes. “The night I ran away from home, there  in that alley, there was a couple of vampires that were going to make a meal of me. You…you…pulled a sword right out of the air. And ended them. You turned  to me and said, ‘You can find sanctuary at The Hallowed House of Spirits.’  Eric was there. That was the first time I met him.”

“Good memory,” Gabriel smiled.

Pam had a moment. She did not believe in angels. Especially ones that watched out for the likes of her. “What, what did you do with the…the remains you pulled out of the club?”

“In the back of my trash truck. I’ve got Compton back there as well if you would like to get in one last good-bye.”

“Can Cedric look as well?” she asked.

“Certainly,” she smiled. “Zeke, open the back, the boys have visitors.”

As the back opened, the stench of hell came rolling out.

“Gawd, I’d know Compton’s smell anywhere,” Pam grinned. “Bill the Boob, I know you are back there, show yourself! Cedric is here with me and we wish to say our hello’s!”

There was screaming and cursing and finally something that had the appearance of Bill Compton slithered to the front.

“You bitch!” he screamed. “And I see you have that lower than Were shit Irish with you!”

“Damn boy’o, you are lookin’ a bit of rough and puked up and out. But I must say you are a’lookin’ much better than the last time I saw you.”

“Bill, you have guests,” came another voice that was screaming in pain, “and you did not tell me!”

“You just continue to disappoint your friends,” Pam laughed.

“Judas, just shut the fuck up,” he bellowed back.

Pam and Cedric looked at each other than over at Gabriel.

“The original?’ they both said.

“The one and only,” she rolled her eyes.

“Thanks for the…the…” Pam motioned with her hands to the back. “I’ll tell Eric…”

“Best to you and yours,” Gabriel smiled at her. “And continue to walk your path.”

The angel in the orange work jump suit turned to go.

“Excuse me,” Pam reached out to her with her hand. “Eric’s piece of Heaven…is there a place for me, there?”

“Child,” her eyes met Pam’s, her voice was soft and sweet, “he would be most disappointed if there was not. You know how he is…” she chuckled. “We would all be disappointed,” her voice was sincere.” Then with a grin she added, “We would miss you particular brand of snark.

Cedric,” she bowed her head to him, climbed up into the truck, closed the door and motored off.

They were silent as they watched as the blinker came on and the truck turned the corner.

“I am going to be a big sister. I am going to be the best big sister in the world.”

“I never doubted,” Cedric said taking her hand.

“Thank you,” she said.

“For what lass,” he asked, lifting her chin up and brushing the tears away.

“For always giving me hope.”

“Tis the way of the Irish, Lass.”

“What part of Ireland are you from, originally?” she asked as they walked off hand-in-hand.

“Dublin,” he replied.

“Will you take me there sometime?”

“To my seat of government?”

“No, your home. Where you had your beginning?”

“Of course,” he replied and as they walked toward Bon Temps, holding hands, the sun began to rise, the air to heat and the birds to take shelter. There was a storm brewing. Not one of Eric’s making.

And Passion was its name.

 

 

Dear Readers,

So ends another story. Sorry this chapter  took so long. I am no longer driving the bus in Crazy…have been promoted to driving the train….alllllll aboard!

The blue agave is still free in Crazy…so stop on by and let me buy you a drink!

I am back to publishing original fiction…I seem to remember taking a break from it and writing a short blast I was calling the Eclipse of the Blood Moon…please stop laughing, you know I can hear you!

As always, thanks for reading!

Be blessed and be the blessing,

CES

The Curse of the Eclipsing Blood Moon—Chapter 16

 

Banner The Curse of the Eclipsing Blood MoonChapter 16

The characters of the Southern Vampire Mysteries belong to Miss Charlaine Harris. No infringement on my part is intended. The characters on True Blood belong to Mr. Alan Ball. No infringement on my part is intended.

I have no BETA, editor, or other such charming person. All mistakes are my own. This Story is rated M.

The Curse of the Eclipsing Blood Moon

Chapter 16

“And get that fucking Bill Compton on the phone. He was supposed to meet us here, tonight, with Sophie-Anne in tow, telling us the access codes to her bank accounts and where she hides her gold,” Cacius hissed and kicked at a rock. He hit it dead on with his toes and screamed in pain.

“The Vampire Queen is not going to go anywhere with Compton,” Leroy shook his head and unlocked the car. “Compton just told you that so he could get in on the ruling game. That sorry ass is not going to work for anything. I have been doing some dealing with him and he will stab you in the back the first chance he gets while being all self-righteous and up in your face about how much this and that cost and now he needs to double his money because…well…just because. He is one self-entitled shit for brains.”

“You told me to hire him,” Cacius pouted as he got in the car.

“No I did not,” Leroy fired back as he started the car. “I said I knew him and that he worked in S-A’s residence. I said nothing about hiring him. That is all on you.”

“I am a god,” Cacius smirked. “I do not make mistakes.”

“Fasten your seat belt,” Leroy put the car in drive.

“No,” he laughed. “I will not.”

“Look, we can get stopped…”

“Do not care, I am not driving,” Cacius laughed.

“Very good then,” Leroy replied as he hit the gas and went from 0 to 60 and then slammed on the brakes.

Cacius’ head hit the windshield and there was a scream of pain.

“Fasten your seatbelt, you moron. I do not want us getting pulled over. And that body is human and can easily be killed, in case you did not know that. Fragile stuff, human.”

“Fucking fuck fuck,” Cacius wept, rubbing his head. “You did that on purpose.”

“Damn straight I did. Now fasten that seat belt or you are walking to Shreveport.”

“Very disrespectful,” he was still weeping. “When I get all this figured out, you are going to be the first one I eat. You will be my sacrifice on the altar!”

“Keep dreaming,” Leroy laughed. “Without me, you would be walking to Shreveport. Your ancient ways and that body that has not one idea about anything beyond pouting and getting someone else to drive him around will not play well for you.  That old man had no magic which is why you are having such a difficult time with this. Admit it. You went for the weak willed so you could take over. Well congratulations on that. You are so far behind the learning curve for this society that a two-year old has more savvy.”

“What makes you think,” he snarled, “that I will not just trash this body and take yours?”

“For one, I have no-o-o-o-o magic and I have a will of my own. And for another, I am beginning to believe that it does not work that way. You picked that body. You. And to you it now belongs. When it dies, you do not get to jump to another. Your soul and his get to face judgement. That would be something I know a little bit about.”

Cacius sat glaring at him and spitting curses in a language no one remembered.

“You just vent while I put it all out there. I know what a dumb fuck you are. Seriously, you thought you could overthrow The Creator of All. Even I know that cannot be done. So that puts me ahead of you on the genius scale.

Now,” he glanced over at his passenger who looked like he was going to stroke out. “Your face is a charming shade of purple. I do not think that is all bruise this fast. And you have to have a certain amount of regard for that human construct. You look like you are about to blow a blood vessel in your brain. That body can kill itself just as easily as a bullet. Like I said, fragile stuff so just get a grip and bring your blood pressure under control.

All I want is to rule. I have no magic so that will be your department and you can set yourself  up to be worshiped 24/7 by the masses. Or hell, since you will be a god, put more hours in the day. Bottom line is that I need you and you need me. Plus, we have thousands of years of knowing each other.

Like any other long-term relationship, we have our ups and downs. But it has been mostly good,” he smiled at Cacius. “Come on, admit it.”

“I liked you better on your knees, coming as a supplicant, begging for favors,” he pouted.

“Well you just keep that thought. With that body, there is a whole new reason to have someone on their knees in front of you,” he chuckled. “Human can suck at times, but it also has some delightful charms.”

“You mean the rutting,” Cacius gagged.

“Spoken like someone who has never indulged. We are going to change that. I happen to have a couple of ladies on my calendar who will be more than happy to meet me in my chambers. You be nice to me and they will break your cherry. And if women are not your thing, well, we have other options.”

“I am looking through his memories. I see nothing of this type. He kept himself celibate. For…for fueling his magic…”

“It does take all kinds,” the judge laughed and shook his head. “Well then, you are in for a real treat. A double breaking cherry ceremony moment. This calls for multiples of everything. Let us get the party started. But not in my chambers. This is going to require someplace with a bit more space.”

 

 

“As much as I hate to break up the party,” Sookie smiled at the group, “but maybe we should be there to greet them when they show up.

Could you guys fly us back?”

“Good idea,” Eric nodded. “Let us divide and conquer. Or not,” he grinned. “I do not remember ever riding on the back of a dragon. O.I. are you up for maybe stretching a bit in size and taking us home?”

“Always glad to be of service,” the dragon winked. “Buts gonna needs a bit more space than this. How abouts if I move to the terrace. Do we needs the size of a 747 or somethin’ smaller? If we is gonna make the YouTubes goodness for a dragon sightin’ I want it to be memorable!”

 

 

Pam checked her messages. Boss Man was alive and well.

I am at Fangtasia. Where are you?”

“N. O.”

“Wrap it up and haul ass. Going to war.”

“The fun just never stops,” she grinned. “Going super-sonic is five, four, three, two, one…!”  she typed into her phone. The she was gone.

 

 

Lafayette was behind the bar, fixing everyone’s favorite drink. Ian and Cedric were drinking Eric’s mead. Samuel was sipping on a sweet red wine out of Israel. Eric was still giving Gran and Sookie the royal tour, along with all the magic that wanted to chat them up. And there was a lot!

Pam was sitting at the bar, inspecting her coin and occasionally watching the magics as they tasted everything that Lafayette made and opened a few bottles of their own. Anything with chocolate in it was up for grabs. Literally! You did not want to come between a 3,000 pound gargoyle and his hot chocolate with Bailey’sin it!

It was 0900 hours and she was sitting in a sunbeam that filtered through a 16thcentury stained glass window that cast burgundy shadows over the crystal glasses on the bar back.

She was not for real sure what to make of Eric. Before he had turned her, she knew that he really was all that. He had killed her perverted father in a duel and burned her mother alive on the upper floor of their home that he had won at Parlay.  Well, and he had won her mother as well. So, it was actually his home and his woman that burned to the ground.

Her mother, a worse pervert than her father, was screaming. Not in pain, but the fact that her daughter, Pamela, should be the one roasting in hell and not her.

Yes, momma sweetest still haunted the area on the nights of a full moon. You could find her in Lafayette Square, wailing and moaning and pissing about missing her daughter and did anyone know where she had taken herself too.

“Poetry in motion,” she thought, as she watched Eric strategize with the magics. “And my maker has real estate in Heaven,” she rolled her eyes. Everyone was crowing about that! “Well why the fuck not,” she sighed, “he owns property everywhere else. I wonder if he has a place on the Lake of Fire in Hell? And if he does, I am sure he is going to make those poor fuckers who reside there pay rent.”

Then there was Momma Sookie. Literally. When Eric told her she was going to have a brother she almost peed herself!

Sookie and Gran were presently in the Library sleeping. Apparently Momma Sookie now came with her own arsenal of weapons. It was damned impressive to watch her magic up an effervescent bubble that reflected all the colors as the sun came up and hit it. A bubble that once the bad guys passed through it, they were trapped inside it.

”We are going to keep the baddies, contained,” Sookie had pronounced with a voice that she did not recognize! That had scared her a bit. Momma Sookie had flashed with the same type of effervescence! It had haloed around her and for a moment, Pam thought maybe, just maybe, she was bearing witness to Eric’s mate’s aura. Or hell, maybe spirit. At this point, she had not one fucking clue! And was in no mood to pursue that line of thinking.

“See what happens when you spend time from the family,” Ian had said to her more than once with a grin. “Oh, the things you miss out on,” he had added smugly.

“Well yes, I can only blame myself. I get a coin to carry around, those fuckers got to swallow theirs,” she sighed and gave Cedric the evil eye.

The Irish lad saddled up next to her. “Havin’ second thoughts are we now,” he grinned, “about how you have treated me in the past,” he winked at her. “Tis indeed a lovely coin you have, one that you can be admirin’ and this’n and that. Sadly, I had to swallow my portion so I cannot be a’takin’ it out and watchin’ it sparkle in the sun’s glorious light.”

“You reek of Were shit,” she smiled at him and clinched her nose shut with her thumb and finger.

“I know,” he winked at her. “But I was wonderin’ if I could be admirin’ your sparkly shoes in the sunlight.”

“These old things,” she made a face at him but was none-the-less pleased. “I have some strappy little black Jimmy Choo’s that perhaps have one or two diamonds on them.”

“Well now,” his smile got bigger, “just perhaps we could be admirin’ those as well.”

“They are in my office,” she replied standing.

“Would you be invitin’ me to be your escort?” he asked nonchalantly.

“I could do worse,” she glared at him, “but not much worse.”

“Aye lass, but you will do none better,” he smiled at her. “Cause I know your faults and foibles, and I have perhaps, on one or two occasions, known other parts of you as well.”

Pam glared at him as she slipped her hand onto the arm that he offered her.

“In my slumber, I still dream about those moments,” he whispered to her.

“As well you should,” she snarked back but quickened her pace a bit.

Opening the door to the offices with her card Eric looked over to where the two had disappeared and smiled.

“Good,” he nodded to Ian. “That should keep her occupied for a while. She has over a hundred pair of shoes in her office. She will strut her stuff  for Cedric to admire, doing wonderful things to both of their libidos.”

“Mo’ fo’n,” O.I. said as he watched the two of them disappear behind the door. “I woulds not have believed if I hads not seen. Don’t knows that I gots big enoughs balls to take her on.”

“It’s an Irish thing,” Ian replied. “The accent, their luck and all that.”

“I would not date her,” Eric chuckled. “And I just hope the Irish lad’s luck does not run out when he is with her.

Now, where were we?” he was once more all business as the chess game in his head came to life there on the top of bar. Picking up a pawn he moved it on the board. “Madden,” Eric made a face, “is going to make a very bad choice. He thinks S-A is now vulnerable with a residence that has been damaged. I am beginning to believe that it was S-A that Compton was waiting for in the cloisters. Madden was noticeably missing from the camera feeds once the fires started.”

Samuel nodded in agreement.

“So Madden and Compton think they can rule Louisiana,” Ian added. “Where would they find the shock troops to make that happen?”

“Out of state Weres,” Eric replied. “Just find S-A and end her. With her residence gone, you just set up your new seat of power wherever.”

“So we are fighting a two front war,” Samuel regarded the board and moved a bishop. “Weres, along with a fallen angel and his lacky.”

Eric smiled. “Appears to be so. Let them come. We are ready.”

 

 

It was a night of debauchery! It was a night of fun and frolic! It was a night that should be repeated and live on forever and ever!

Cacius stood nude on the balcony looking out over-looking  the ocean. The sun was up and you could smell the salt water as the breeze lifted the grey hairs on his head.

Leroy was still in their pounding in someone! Maybe on someone. He was not sure and did not care. He was so bleary-eyed and content in his soul it was hard to imagine living without this. And whatever drugs he had ingested during last night’s bacchanal, well…they went down excitedly and with enthusiasm with all the alcohol!

The human that had owned this body had done a fine job of maintaining it. He was going to see to it personally that it got a few miles put on it before it burned itself up.

“Damn,” he regarded the sun high up in the sky. “I could use something to eat. Leroy said something about a grill and a fire pit in the back yard.”

Going back inside he considered the bodies that were sleeping. Oops…one appeared to not be breathing and the body was canted in a most awkward position.  He was sure that the head was on backwards. “Reeks of death,” he smiled. “Saves me the trouble of killing it. Now, somewhere there is another bag of that fine white powder. Let’s get the fire going, baste it in blow, and have brunch.”

 

 

 

 

Eric opened the library doors and watched as Sookie stirred about on the couch. Gran had gotten up an hour ago and it was now one. Time for his sleeping beauty to get up. Not that he wanted to disturb her…or maybe he did…he missed her when she was not about. But Gran had said pregnant mommies-to-be need to eat about six small meals a day.

Walking over to her he kneeled down beside her head and placed kisses all over her face.

His soul warmed his body when she smiled and her hand reached for him.

“Sookie,” he whispered in her ear.

“Yes,” she sighed and whispered back.

He placed a kiss on her lips, gentle and filled with longing for this…this moment…that he had never experienced  for the past thousand years.

Breaking off the kiss, he nuzzled her ear.  “I love you,” he placed a light kiss on her lips.

Opening her eyes, there was wonder and hope and joy…yes, he could see that joy that he had made her feel…

“I love you,” her hands stroked his face and outlined his lips.

“Will you marry me?” he asked.

Sitting up on the couch, she drew her legs up under her. “You don’t have to do this,” she said softly.

“This is,” he took both of her hands in his, his eyes never leaving hers, “what a man does when he is in love.”

“I am not much…” she began.

“You are the woman that I love. That makes you everything,” he countered.

From around his neck he pulled a leather thong from under his shirt. “My grandmother told me that one day I would find my heart’s desire. For centuries, I did not know what that was. Now I know that my heart’s desire is my family. My wife, my son, perhaps more children to follow.

Would you please grant me my heart’s desire?” he asked her softly, his eyes pleading, love in his voice, his hands soft and gentle upon her hands as he slipped the ring from the leather. Raising her left hand to his, he kissed it.

“Yes,” she managed to say as her voice choked, her smile lighting the room, her eyes a reflection of the love that flowed in his.

Kissing her lightly on the lips, he slipped his mother’s wedding band onto her finger.

The ring was a massive gold piece done in the shape of a dragon. The gold strands so tightly woven together the piece looked to be solid.  The dragon’s head sat at the front, facing her, with a crown of rubies set into it. The rest of its body wrapped around Sookie’s finger. In the dragon’s mouth was a ruby the size of a child’s marble. There were blue sapphires for the eyes and paved around the dragon’s body were clear stones.

“Ruby, sapphires and diamonds,” Eric said watching the sunlight reflect off the ring. “My father was a clan chieftain and was not without raiding skills. He brought back the gold and jewels from  a successful raid and had Usha, the village artist, make this for her. Where ever Mother went all were to know who she was and to whom she was married. If anyone thought to disrespect her, well, she could deal with them at sword point just as well as my father could. She was fierce and yet so gentle.

I kept it in a jug of mead under my office floor,” he said raising Sookie’s hand to his lips and kissing the ring. “To my queen,” his voice trembled, “I do so swear fealty.”

Sookie began to cry softly as Eric rose and took her in his arms. “You need to eat, Lover, Gran said so. She said six small meals a day. You have missed several already. Let us get you fed and on your way to making me a father of a handsome son.”

“That looks just like his father,” Sookie chuckled as Eric wiped her eyes.

“Well of course,” he leaned over and kissed her nose. “Your husband is a very handsome, charming and dangerous rogue. The same will be said about Erikr.”

“What is he turns out like his mother?” she smiled at him.

“Pity the world,” Eric said, his voice serous. “A more beautiful and fierce druid has never walked the earth.”

“What if he turns out to be like his Uncle Samuel,” Sookie chuckled.

“That is not possible,” Eric replied as he swept her up into his arms. “Father God would not be so cruel. There is not room for twice that amount of vengeance.”

“What?” Sookie laughed. “Samuel?”

“You have not one clue, Lover, what Samuel is capable of. He will not only eradicate all your money, he will remove your history as well. It will be as if you never existed.”

“Like the ancient Egyptians,” she nodded.

“No,” Eric shook his head. “Samuel says he perfected that system while the Egyptians were still living in mud huts and were crocodile snacks. The pharaohs thought they knew how to eliminate your name. They had not one fucking clue. There were a couple of pharaohs that pissed Samuel off and several complete dynasty’s disappeared from the world’s history. Along with all their wealth.”

“Seriously,” Sookie arched an eyebrow at him.

“I kid you not,” Eric replied with an arched eyebrow of his own. “Do not let my sweet, kind brother fool you. He is by far worse than I could ever dream of being. And believe me. I can be bad.”

Setting her down, he waltzed with her into the bar area, the magics singing and Piano playing as they called their hellos and well wishes!

“The happy couple,” was shouted in greeting as they made the bar.

“And would you just look at what is sittin’ on that girl’s marriage finger,” Lafayette hooted! “It is blindin’ me from here. Lordy, we needs us some eye protection!”

“Congratulations!” was shouted by everyone. Eric lifted Sookie high into the air and then set her feet on the floor, and very gracefully, bent her back in a soul searing kiss!

There was thundering applause from vampires, humans and magics as well wishes were called and everyone lined up to kiss on the bride and groom.

“A toast!” Ian shouted.

Pam poured up glasses of the honey mead for the vamps as Lafayette poured porto for the humans and magics.  A hushed silence fell over the club as Bell chimed down the hour.

“Let the hour of three in the afternoon become a sacred time for our family,” Samuel said raising his glass in a toast. “Here is to my brother, his wife and his son. May the name of Northman live on through family yet to come. And may the name of Northman gain in strength and majesty and love.”

“Hear, hear!” was shouted as glasses were drained dashed into the fireplace.

“We is havin’ us some nourishments of the finest kinds,” Lafayette motioned with both hands to the food that was stationed on the bar. “Baby momma needs to eat. I cans personally guarantees the fineness of the pumpkin soup and the turkey with cornbread stuffin, is just abouts as good as I makes.”

“Gravy and stuffin’,” O.I rolled his eyes up into the back of his head. “Done and gones on to the other side and am back for a second helpin’.  Amens and hallelujahs.  And that porto, mighty good sippin’.”

“Looks like I am behind,” Sookie took a sniff and realized she was hungry!

“By several platefuls,” Gran sighed as she patted her tummy. “I think  am going to finish up the savory with another bowl of that soup with a piece of brown bead with lots of butter on it. And that fresh blackberry jam, lord have mercy! Just begging to be put on that bread. Then I will think about dessert.”

“Awww Gran,” Sookie eyed her. “That is bad for your heart and the arteries leading up to your heart and…”

Gran blew her a kiss. “I thank you Grand-daughter for your concern. But O.I. was going on so about the brown bread with the Irish butter and he cut me a slice and offered it to me and I told him that just like bacon, I was not supposed to have butter, either.

He said, ‘Well mo’ fon’ Gran, I gots just whats will cure all your ills.’ Well, he pricked his finger and offered me a drop of his blood. I feel like I am eighteen, ready to take on the world!” she grinned.

“Coulds not be believen our goods and righteous Grans could not be havin’ any of the Irish goodness,” O.I. sighed. “That is just wrongs, wrongers and…and…” he sputtered, “shamefullies wrongiest!”

“I plan on living to see my great-grandbabies grow up and spoiling them rotten,” she grinned. “Now, how about a fresh pot of coffee. I know the caterers left another carafe or two.”

 

The rest of the afternoon passed in a pleasant way.  Eventually dessert was discussed and brought out and cut. It was Monday night so the bar was closed and they continued on in their fine company until dark descended and there was a rap at the back door.

“Now just who do you think that is?” Pamela rolled her eyes. “And seriously,” she said looking at the monitor behind the bar, “Madden at the back door. Compton  and his crew of Were shits hiding out in that copse of trees. Damn, I love having this place wired.

This is just pathetic. Eric, how do you want to play this?”

“I will get the back and let Madden close the door. I have seen Victor  try to be sneaky. It should provide all of you watching a good laugh.”

The owner stepped out.

Eric had left the bar door into the back open so that they could hear.  The door opened and in stepped Madden. He was bloody and reeked of death and war and was yelling about sub-light particle weapons and swords that cut with a laser! And he was in a fight for the freedom of all vampires in Louisiana, maybe the world!

Eric was throwing bullshit flags all over the back hall and yet maintained a straight face. This was, he thought, one of his finest moments! Damn, it took all his vampire strength to not laugh out loud!

“DeCastro is in the area, Eric! I came to warn you!” he was still talking as fast as he could, trying to get all the facts out as Eric escorted him into the bar.

“I came to warn you as you are the last bastion of her reign.  You are all that stands between sanity and anarchy and that little tyrant from Nevada!”

Eric wished he could roll his eyes! But sadly, Victor just might read that as he did not give a fuck. Well, no need for him to. Pamela was not only rolling her eyes but sticking her finger down her throat. If this was not just pathetic, it would be laughable.  Clearly, Compton had beat on him. Victor had done his best to keep the outside door from being closed and Eric had let him play that game. “What do you want me to do?” Eric looked at him. “We are having a family celebration.”

“What?” Victor stammered. “Did you not hear me? DeCastro is in the area! He has declared war! You will be the dust beneath his feet if you do not join with me and defeat him! We must to war!” he shouted as he looked around the bar. Sure enough, there was food out for the humans, but he did not see any blood bags…unless the humans were the blood bags…but they were certainly not the type of blood bags he would celebrate with! Bill had assured him that Eric had tasty and lovely things on Monday nights to entertain him.  Well, just fine then, he would make do with the little blonde.

“We will need to feed before we defend the perimeter,” he nodded to Eric as his glance took in all of Sookie. His gaze stopped on her third finger, left hand.

“That…that looks like a Viking ring. A very old school Viking ring…” his voice trailed off. There stood Eric, looking like death! And this little bit of fluff, also looking like death!

“Yes,” Sookie smiled. “It belonged to Eric’s mother. His father, the king, had it made for her so that wherever she went, all would know who she was and act accordingly. If they were disrespectful, she would pull her sword and end their life. Now, this greatly disappointed Eric’s father, because he wanted to end the cocksucker himself.”

“Yes Lover,” Eric nodded, “very true. Far would wail and piss and moan about Mor coming home a bloody mess but she would let him bathe her before they would go and sit in the sauna.

The women in our family,” Eric smiled at her, “are as tough as they come. And their love lives through the ages. Such was the woman of my Mor and such is the woman of my children.

Lover,” Eric said and tossed her a sword.

Maybe she was just not fluff after all! The human caught it in mid-flight!  Obviously, this was not the first time she had handled a sword! And Eric had called her lover! So obviously it was not the first time she had handled a vampire!

Which was a scary-odd but strangely appealing thought! “What children! Was Eric going to include  her in the child making process? That was impossible? Unless she was some kind of a Supe? She didn’t smell like a Supe, he calmed himself as he took a whiff.

“Did you just sniff me?” Sookie asked, taking a step forward.

“Yes, I mean no…” Victor shrugged and gave her his most charming smile and maybe put a little glamour into his voice. Which, he realized after he did it was one of the biggest cocksucking mistakes he had made in his entire life…and was possibly his last one…. “Yes,” he said when he felt the sword at his neck and she was standing toe-to-toe with him. “It is just I am a bit nervous, beat up and looking for a place of refuge.

You know Eric,” he shifted his attention and felt the blade go deeper into his skin. “I came to give the alarm. You know, one  if by land, two if my sea. Hell, since this is by plane and car, I thought maybe I should just come in person. I can now see that in my eagerness to spread the news, I running on all circuits, vampire. All my defenses are up and running. Maybe I should have just called this in.”

“Maybe you should have,” Eric nodded in agreement.

“Look Eric, I am sorry about the gross offense. I know it is wrong to sniff another vamp’s meat, but…”

Eric had his hand around Victor’s heart, with Victor’s feet dangling in the air.

“You were saying,” Eric shook him around and then brought him down so they were eye-to-eye.

“I do so apologize,” he managed to get out.

There was chiming sounding throughout the room.

“Sounds like an alarm has been activated,” Pam grinned. “But we all know Victor came alone,” she batted her eyelashes at the stupid vampire that had not one fucking clue.

“Oh look,” Eric turned Victor so that he could see the monitor. “Someone is coming in the backdoor. Why Victor, would that be your friends?”

“You are so fucked Eric,” he managed to get out. “I am draining the little blonde  so that I can heal and then I will join in on the fight. Hope we do not damage the club. I am going to make it my new HQ.”

“Are you now? Who is up for a brawl?” Eric called out.

Before Victor’s eyes a nightmare came to life! A gypsy had told him that a pewter tankard would kill him! Would you look at that! Those tankards came flying off the shelf and were now hovering around him.

“You told me once, Victor that you were invincible,” Eric grinned. “That the only way you were going to die would be by tankard. So I began collecting them. And not just any tankard. But those who had a mind of their own. These particular fine fellows drown several SS officers in their own beer one night. That caused quite the ruckus in the higher ups. The Schutzstaffelbanned all alcohol for their men from that point on. So, as much as I would like to end you, I would not dare deny you your destiny.”

They all watched as Eric dropped Madden to the floor and the tankards moved in for the kill.

“What is that they are  pouring into his nose, mouth and sucking chest wound?” Sookie asked.

“Smells like the ouzo,” Pam fanned her nose. “From time to time I get hungry for that stuff. Spent a little time in Greece,” Pam said watching the scene intently. “But it is deadly. It is made from anise. Vampires can have a hard time with that is you do not build up a tolerance, first. I would sway Victor has not. He started dying whenever it hit his open wounds. And those tankards…seriously, they rock. Two of them using their handles to hold his mouth open will the others just hover and pour the alcohol in. Get ready, you see how Victor is now flailing around all over the floor, those are his final death spasms as he searchs for freedom. ”

They all nodded.

“In all his bad thrashin’ ‘bouts and jockin’ for the front door and livin’, gettins’ to-o-o-o-o close to the fire place.” Lafayette took a step back. “I has sets a glass of ouzoon fire more than once. I likes it with the coffee bean on top all toasted. Thinks we is gonna have us a flambéed vamp.  You can see the smokes startin’ to rise…oops….and there he goes. Burned up just like you sees the magic man do on stage when alls there is is a puff of smokes and the paper is gone.”

“Nicely done,” they all applauded.

The tankards all gave a clanking high five and scurried back to the bar.

“Where the hell is Compton and the Weres?” Sookie asked. “Thought they would come charging through that door by now.”

“They are waiting outside the kitchen door,” Pam smiled and adjusted her lip stick. “Can’t you smell it? That is prime rib in the ovens. And a lot of noise coming from there.

So they are being cautious because no one said anything about anyone being in the kitchen working. They might be Weres and they might be fast but kitchen folks come with sharp knives. So they are sneaking around. Probably trying to get a better look. And a Were is always hungry. They are looking for a free meal, maybe with a side of fries if they wait long enough. Let me see, let us switch to the cameras in the kitchen. And you know Compton is not coming in until the all clear is given, fucking lower than Were shit coward,” Pam hissed.

“Land of Goshen,” Gran whistled, “nice kitchen! And would you look at that! That whisk  is whisking all by itself…and speaking of sharp knives…looks like a salad is being chopped.”

“That’s a mistake,” Pam snickered. “Weres do not eat anything green.”

“Who is the gargoyle?” Ian asked. “Does not look like one of mine that ended up here.”

“That,” Eric smiled, “is Juliet.”

“Indeed it is,” Cedric put on his best face. “She came off my castle. Wanted, no pleaded to go home with Eric. So there she is.”

“Mm-m-m,” Sookie made yummy noises. “Looks like she is putting something chocolate into the oven.”

“She makes a mean chocolate souffle, or so I have been told,” Samuel sighed. “Light and fluffy.”

“Well, those clouds of Heaven takes about twenty five minutes. Let us get this done, His La La Fineness, says. I want mines hot out of the ovens, just as God intended!

And lordy and hallelujah! Is that an orange sauce she is makin’ to go on tops. I wants mine drowin’ in that righteous goodness. What do we needs to do to make this happen?”

“Since they did break in and are lookin’ to kill us,” Sookie was watching the monitor as the Weres tried doors in the hall and scratched their balls with the silencer on their pistols, “I think we need to have the advantage.”

“Agreed,” everyone said.

“Then grab the weapon of your choice and open the door to the back, Eric. Just like any good ninja, we are slicing the bullets into pieces with our swords.”

“Seriously?” Ian asked.  “Swords, I did not bring mine.”

“Do not be question’n the lady,” Cedric hooted. “Look at that glow around her. And the sparks sizzling on those swords that just appeared on the table!”

“Souffles are in the oven,” Eric grinned, “let’s get this party started,” as he walked over to the door, unlocked it and yelled, “Olly, olly, oxen  free.”

That is when the ruckus started. There was swearing in French and some German. Lots of banging of pans, big pans, sounding like they made contact with something even bigger as things hit the floor with a thud and often screaming.

“Swords at the ready,” Eric said as he started toward the kitchen door. Opening it, he was relieved to see not much blood spatter but plenty of dead Weres.

“Death-by-whisk, on this one,” Gran remarked. “Looks like it was showed down his throat and into…well,” she made a sour face, “just into.”

“Some blood spatter over here,” Pam said toeing the body with her boot. “Looks like death by rolling pin.”

“Yes,” Sookie nodded. “Would you just look at how flat his face is. That is some nice rollin’. I mean, that is pie crust thin.”

“Just damn impressive,” Gran nodded.

“Yes,” Lafayette looked it over. “That is what you gets when rollin’ is done by a professional. Just damn impressive. Not even on La’s La’s best rollin’ days have I seen somethin’ so round and perfects.”

“That is a fact,” Gran agreed.

As they were all admiring the carnage done by top-notch kitchen equipment, there was a chiming sound.

“Who the fuck is that,” Pam growled, “coming through the back door?” she was shaking her head as she checked the monitor.  “What the fuck! It’s DeCastro.”

“Busy night,” Eric grinned as he walked towards toward the back to do the meet and greet.  “The King of Nevada,” was called out in enthusiasm as Eric walked DeCastro into the kitchen. “Sire, what brings you to Louisiana and into my club?” Eric asked, his sword at DeCastro’s throat.

“Sheriff,” he smiled uneasily. “Victor Madden told me to meet him here,” he said looking around and grimacing.

“He said to come to Louisiana and rescue my bride to be, Sophie-Anne, from the clutches of evil.”

“Well, my queen in in N.O. supervising repair work on her manor home and I am here and Madden has met the true death. Does that answer all your questions?”

“But…I just talked to Victor…” his voice trailed off as Eric’s blade dug a little deeper into his throat.

“Yes, and Victor just died, about oh, what, maybe three minutes ago?” Eric looked out into the crowd for their approval.

“About that,” Eire, nodded in agreement.

“Yes,” Ian checked his watch. “I would say that…”

And then DeCastro did not care any longer. His head was gone and he went to goo.

“How come he did not change to dust?” Sookie asked. “What a mess!”

“The vamp that made him was young,” Eric replied. “If your maker is old, you are dust, if young, well,” he pointed to the mess on the floor with his sword, “you are goo.”

“What the fuck!” Pamela groused as they heard the knock at the front door. “Is our OPEN sign on? Are we trending somewhere on social media? Do people not have lives that they must come here looking for entertainment?”

“Child,” Eric grinned at her as he looked over at the monitor. “I will do the honors and send them away, or remove their heads. I could go either way.”

“Is that Mississippi and Talbot?” Ian asked, shock in his voice.

“Appears to be,” Eric sighed as he left the kitchen, everyone in his wake, not wanting to miss out on the next round of excitement.

Swinging open the front doors, Eric bowed and said, “Your majesty, what may I do for you with what remains of the old dark?”

“Talbot,” Eric bowed his head in a way of greeting.

“Sheriff,” Russell began and then delicately sniffed the air. “Is this a bad time?”

“It is if you are Victor Madden or DeCastro. What may I do for you?”

“Well, ah-h-h-h,” Russell was trying to digest this new information and was having a hard time wrapping his head around it.

“We want to know who you got to set the stones in your henge?” Talbot stepped up. “We are looking to import one and…and…” he looked past Eric and saw Ian and Cedric grinning.

“Your majesties,” Talbot offered a grand and sweeping bow. “I have been in contact with your people, please, if I might have a moment of your time? I am looking for a small but exceptional henge. I am not interested in what the Euro trash is putting up and passing off as ancient and sanctified.”

“Please,” Eric stepped aside. “Come in. The Irish Lad and British Isle will probably be most happy to answer your questions.”

Looking into a tankard off to the side, Eric could see them grimace and then step up.

“Just watch your step as you kick up the dust,” Eric cautioned them. “That would be Madden wanting to attach to your shoes. You might want to hover past that area by the fireplace. The worst of it seems to be there.”

“Sheriff,” Russell smiled. “That smell…that distinct smell of dead vampire, would that be DeCastro?”

“Yes,” Eric grinned. “The King of Nevada in the kitchen with a sword.”

“What?” Russell took a step back.

“It is a board game called Clue,”Sookie said. “Solve the mystery murder…who, with what and where.”

“Oh,” Russell nodded in understanding. “We did play that one night, only we were…” his voice trailed off as he watched the older woman raise her sword and fire ran down its blade and dripped off onto the floor. The dust that had been Victor now sparked and looked like fireworks going off.

“Please be seated at a table, gentlemen,” Eric pulled out a chair,  being the congenial host.  “We are going to continue on with our meal. I believe I heard the timer. Perfect timing.  The chocolate souffles are about to be served.”

What was left of the old dark passed quietly. Talbot was so full of joy while he talked to the Islands and was oblivious to what was going on around him.

All of Russell’s senses were on high alert. There was an occasional flutter of wings, he thought, about the building and he knew he was being watched. He did not know by what but there were eyes on him from every direction.

He was finally dead, he knew, if he appeared to be a threat. So he made damn sure that he was pleasant and amenable. And that was actually easy. Talbot was in his element! His mate had studied and read and watched endless PBSdocumentaries about the old ones that built the henges and he was able to discuss intelligently with the two Islands what he wanted, needed, and he especially wanted the pedigree on the original builders.

“I don’t want any dark sacrifices on that altar stone,” he had stressed more than once. “This is to be a party circle, not a henge of death! I mean, maybe a waterfall spilling into a small pool in the center with the altar in the center  with stepping stones ascending up to it.

What do you think?” he asked hopefully.

“Charming,” Ian nodded.

“Yes, very,” Cedric pulled out his phone. “I know of such a place. It is not very big but the waterfall actually splashes onto the altar stone. Here, one moment and I will show you.”

So the old dark passed. Humans ate, vampires discussed henges and who had done what where, and when they stood to leave, with Russell’s back turned to the crowd, he crossed himself and was thankful that they were walking out alive.

“Get some sleep,” Eric smiled at the humans. “Somewhere out there is Cacius and the judge. They strike me as the type to come calling during the day. We will be here, and we will be ready.”

 

Talk of the raid that night on Fangtasiastarted making the rounds in Louisiana Were circles as it was happening. The locals all knew what the out of towners were there for and kept their distance from Stupid.

Before sunrise, it was known as  Weres  Who Could Not Buy  One Fucking Clue. Alcide just laughed his ass off when packmasters came looking for their own.

They all started the conversation with…

“Well, some of my pack had a high paying job here in Shreveport. Something about…”

…that’s when Alcide would start hooting and hollering at the top of his lungs. “So, you know the dumb fuckers who thought they could take on Northman. Tell their families they won’t be comin’ back, Cher. They are now howling in hell.”

The Scoobey Gang just called it Dying for Chocolateas they made their way to bed in different parts of the building.

The vampires all sat at the bar and watched as sunlight once more streamed in upon them.

“They are close by,” Eric picked up his sword and hefted it.

“Yes,” Ian nodded, “I can feel them. Two of them. I have two distinct vibrations rumbling through my chest.”

“Yes,” Cedric placed both hands on his heart. “Tis so. Two…”

“They won’t be this way until after they get some rest and something to eat. After twelve,” Pam eyed her reflection in the mirror’s morning light. “They don’t want to be caught in here when vampires rise. Eric is old, they want to hedge their bets that he will be fast asleep when they move in for the kill.”

“You can feel it also?” Eric asked.

Pam held out her hand. The coin was standing on its edge and drawing the number two on her palm.

“That would be an affirmative,” she smiled, fangs down.

“I hope these two fuckers have magicked up,” Eric grinned, fangs down as well. “It would just be too easy,” he made a fist and then with a quick  movement, threw open his fist and a ball of lightning went screaming across the room, up the chimney and disappeared.

“Where do you think that went?” he asked.

They all shrugged.

“We can ask Sookie when she wakes up. Maybe she knows,” he smiled and said, “I am having a glass of mead. Who wants one?”

“Set out the glasses and pass the bottle!” Cedric shouted. “Hear! Hear!” was echoed around the room as magics, big and small, bellied up to the bar.

 

 

In the deepest and darkest depths of Hell, the screams of pain and agony from the torture stopped as everyone yelled, “Incoming! It is the Light!” as those folks began diving into The Pit and scratching their way to the very bottom.

It was better to be feasted on and left as a husk than to be burned by the Light! From which there was no recovery! Only agony and misery and hunger. All kept away from you and you could not approach anyone. That is what The Light did. It consumed you and denied you and all you could do was scream!

 

Dear Readers,

Woohoo! Still giving the tours in Crazy. Ask for me by name!

Mistakes abound…I would work on this at the oddest hours…woohoo and pass the tequila!

As always, thanks for reading!

Be blessed and be the blessing,

CES