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Chapter 9     Epilogue

 

The characters of the Southern Vampire Mysteries belong to Miss Charlaine Harris. No infringement on my part is intended. The characters on True Blood belong to Mr. Alan Ball. No infringement on my part is intended.

I have no BETA, editor, or other such charming person. All mistakes are my own.

This story is rated M

 

Breakfast finished up and the kitchen was put to rights and folks went to work. Eric, Sookie, Emmy, and Samuel walked the gardens. Went through the barns and inspected the on-going soap production, waiting for some quiet, alone, adult talking time.

Everywhere they went it was a parade; goats and dogs trotting along behind and sometimes in front expressing their opinions. The dogs had to sniff everything and the goats had to taste everything and the parade was greeted with enthusiasm as they passed by the soap-making kitchen.

Then it was time for lunch. After they ate, Emmy was dropped off with the other kiddos and Sookie, Eric, and Samuel sat down in the living room.

“What did you learn?” Eric asked her.

“That maybe Hadley had a boyfriend. And maybe it was Sam Merlotte. They were a thing when she was still jailbait according to Arlene. He had an apartment over by the mall. Long Pine Apartments. Gated community.  He moved her in when she turned eighteen. Arlene saw them coming out once. So maybe they hooked back up. Apparently they thought they could kill me and take Emmy. Just that quick.”

“That could work,” Samuel nodded.

“And most important,” Eric said, “you are both Adele’s grand daughters. So she could have in fact become the goddess of this coven.”

“So did he open the Hell-Mouth?” Samuel asked.

“Maybe,” Sookie shrugged. “I have no idea how you even begin to do something like that. And why did only one thing come slithering out and Hell did not empty it bowels onto the Earth?

Someone made a beer run,” Sookie said. “And obviously he was on a mission. Eat the barkeep and grab a keg.”

“But that was where the party was going to be held, so it was known in advance that the Hell-Mouth would open there,” Eric said. “We need to talk to Cedric. He tracks this kind of supernatural happening.”

 

It had been a very good All Saint’s Day. Over dinner, both Cedric and Ian agreed that they had never slept so well or had such sweet dreams as they did under the angel’s kiss bed.

Eric had merely arched an eyebrow at both of them as they expanded on the blessed air they had bathed in and the sweet aroma of the wood soap that Miss Sookie washed her floors with.

But there were things Eric wanted to know so the Irish was going to have to get the compliments out of his system. He was being sweet and charming to Sookie and Emmy and that worked for Eric. Let the leprechaun magic float on the air and if it helped to woo Sookie, so much the better. But marry one of his daughters…it was going to take more than some sweet words and a pot of gold!

 

“Cedric,” Sookie asked as she helped herself to a piece of pumpkin pie. “You know anything about Hell Mouth’s? Because I have been trying to understand this all day.”

“What you have,” he began, “is that someone evil had to die on that spot. And the only way he could come slitherin’ out of the bowels of Hell was to carry back to Hell the one that murdered him. So the barkeep had a corrupt, murdin’ soul and was deservin’ of his fate.”

“So,” she put some whipped cream on top of her pie. “So,” she had a bite, “so if Sam did the inviting, he would have had to know that was the spot that the murder took place. So he was someplace watching while the act was committed.”

“Yes,” Cedric nodded. “He very well could have stopped off and sprinkled blood there earlier in the day, just to make them hungry for darkfall and Jason and Hadley.”

“So Sam set this whole thing up to what?” she asked.

“Best guess,” Cedric sniffed the pumpkin latte Lafayette was drinking and looked wistful. “That should be him on the videos closin’ the Hell Mouth. That he was the Slayer.”

“That would explain his fascination with the special-ops group he keeps touting,” she nodded. “He could show the Supernatural world that you did not need a committee of special charged whatevers, just him to close a Hell Mouth.”

“It could play out that way,” Ian nodded in agreement. “So how do we find him?”

“He used to have an apartment in Shreveport. With a little sniffing about,” Eric grinned, “we could see if he still does.”

“You know,” Cedric sniffled and looked woeful, “he would not be expectin’ anything as powerful as a vampire to come breakin’ and enterin’ during the day. That somehow seems unfair,” he sniffled again. “Maybe to keep things even and fair, maybe you should go in the evenin’, when a serial Were…” he paused and looked at Emmy and continued, “such as himself would expect big-bad company.”

Ian sniffled a bit himself and wiped at his eyes as well.

Pamela popped in. “Clearly what is needed here is Brother Samuel. I have seen him blow through all manner of spells. The very best ones were when we were tomb raiding in the Valley of the Kings. Those Egyptian priests, what posers,” she rolled her eyes and made a gagging sound.

Emmy giggled and reached for Pam.

“All finished with my pie, Auntie Pam,” she grinned. “May we please go dance with the goats?”

“You bet,” she nodded. “I found muck boots just like yours. Let’s go put them on and out we will go!”

“Boys night out?” Sookie asked as she added more whipped cream. “I am of the opinion that the Northman Triad works no matter if we are together or apart.”

“We are linked,” Eric nodded and smiled. “Samuel, you feel up to an outing?”

Batting his eye lashes, he smiled and said, “Well, I do believe so. But we should perhaps take the Irish and the English with us. Just in case Merlotte has layered his apartment with another Hell Mouth. Cedric can talk us through it while God blasts it with His lightning. And of course, Eric, you can take a shotgun with rock salt because I know just how much you like blasting anything,” he laughed.

“Someone can borrow mine,” Lafayette said.

“And mine,” Sookie nodded.

“Pamela will be staying here, I think with Emmy,” Eric said. “So that makes three and I have one. Well, most excellent, we can all blast salt into his walls if we need too.”

Ian and Cedric both grinned.

Eric glared at them. “What…you think you have been invited to go hunting with your future father-in-law? Get over yourselves,” he hissed as he squinted his eyes and silver sparks shot out.

“We are going out to politely ask Pamela if we might borrow her fire arm. Please excuse us,” Ian said and they both stood and bowed deeply. From the kitchen you could hear them both laughing and singing as they made their way to the barn.

“Probably they are waltzing as well,” Eric said as he focused on the wall, doing his best to see through it.

“Well then,” Sookie smiled, “you boys set things to right. I will clean the kitchen so you can prepare.”

“I’ll help,” Eric said standing and removing things. “They will need to sweet talk Pam. Eventually she will give in, but it is not going to be right away. We have plenty of time.”

Lafayette carried his plate over to the sink, looked at Samuel, who also excused himself and they both headed into the living room.

Sookie thought that her kitchen was big enough to accommodate two people. She and Gran had always been able to freely move around and not bump into each other.

That did not seem to be the case tonight. Eric was always standing behind her and putting things away that were up high. While he rinsed dishes at the sink, the side of his body would brush up against hers as she loaded them into the dishwasher, their hands touching ever so lightly.

When Sookie washed her hands and started to dry them with a dish towel, Eric took it from her and dried them for her.

“You are making me crazy,” she said as she took the dish towel from him and hung it back on its hook.

“Is that good or bad?” he asked.

“It just is,” she replied softy as she ran her hand down his face.

Eric picked her up and put her on the counter top.

Leaning down to her, they were eye-to-eye and then his mouth touched hers, softly and gently while he pushed his pelvis forward and with his hands on her butt, pulled her toward him. When she made contact with his pelvis, a low, long wail came from her. Eric put his mouth on hers to cover the sound and he held her as she pushed against him. It did not take long, his tongue echoing what she was doing with her pelvis before she shuddered in his arms.

Holding her next to him, her put his head on top of hers as her ragged breathing evened out.

Raising her face, he kissed her lightly on the lips. “I have missed you,” he said so softly that she could barely hear him. “The way you smell, that look on your face when you are thinking about something. The way your hands would hold me after I made love to you. Strong hands, with strength and power radiating out from them. And yet so soft to the touch.”

Sookie nodded. “I know.”

“As much as I hate to say it,” his voice cracked in sorrow, “this way really was for the best.”
“I know,” Sookie sighed. “I know. We had to be safe. And this really was for the best. But I did miss you,” she nodded and felt the tears form.

“Onward to the future,” Eric kissed her again. This time not so sweet and with fire burning through him that he shared with her!

Breaking off the kiss, Sookie smiled at him and shook her head no. “There is a part of me that wants you in my bed, always. There is another part that says I am coming off a five-year heartbreak. That there is nothing to gain by rushing into this.”

“Carefully we shall go then,” he pulled back from her and kissed her on the nose.

“Thank you,” she grinned at him. “Because I was ready to yank your pants down and welcome King Eric back into my life.”

Laughing, she jumped down and was out the door and headed to the barn, with Eric in pursuit.

 

“I can hear your Mommy and Daddy,” Pam said as they continued dancing and singing with the goats.

Emmy grinned. “He is a good daddy. And he loves my mommy. I shall have a brother and sisters,” she said with a sure nod of her head.

Ian and Cedric were dancing with them and were grinning like wolves! Big toothy smiles! “Daughters!” they both wiggled their eyebrows.

Pam looked from one to the other and rolled her eyes. “Miss Emmy, I think it is time to go inside. They came asking a boon and I believe we have made these two dance long enough. We will need you to bless the rock salt.”

“Okay,” she nodded as they put the goats to bed and closed the door and started for the house.

 

Sookie and Eric were still playing chase around a tree out in the pecan grove. He lunged for her and when he fell, shrieking, she took off for the house.

“I did that on purpose,” Eric called out. “Just so I could chase you.

Great view from back here,” he laughed. “Just the best. I love the way your ass wiggles and bounces.”

“What?” she looked over her shoulder. “My ass does not wiggle but is solid and…”

Eric had moved to in front of her and with her next step she was in his arms and his mouth was devouring hers.

Vamp speed they were in the hayloft and Eric was down in the hay with Sookie on top of him.”

“Oh sweet and beautiful lady of my heart,” he brought her hand to his mouth for a kiss. “Tonight I am off to fight a war. Perhaps,” his sad smile reached all the way to his eyes. “Perhaps I shall not return. Would you send this warrior to his grave without one last ride of triumph?”

“Semper Fi,” she wiggled her eyebrows at him as she pulled down his pants.

Eric reached up and pulled hers off, buttons flying everywhere. When she had been divested of all her clothes, she leaned down and kissed his mouth, softly and tenderly while she slid onto him.

“Short, hot and nasty,” she moaned as he grabbed her ass and slid his middle finger in her anus. His tongue dictated what the rest of his body did to her! When she arched her back and slammed into him, he roared in pleasure as he thrust up to meet her passion and pulled her down to him for a kiss as he released himself into her welcoming womb.

Offering him her neck, Eric grew hard again, and as he suckled life’s sweetest nectar, he came, again, with Sookie screaming his name.

 

“I have some work clothes,” Sookie sighed, “in the office.”

“I’ll get them and be right back,” he kissed her as he pulled up his jeans.

 

When Eric returned, she pulled on the denim jeans and work shirt. Gathering up her clothes, Eric floated them back down to Mother Earth.

“It is past Emmy’s bedtime,” she shook her head.

“We’ll get her tucked in and then we’ll go,” Eric said as he put his arm around her and they headed for the house. When they went in, Pam was reading the Three Billy Goats Gruff and everyone was acting out the parts.

“I am going to go shower,” Sookie said as they came in.

“Auntie Pam already gave me a shower. So we are reading!” Emmy said clapping her hands.

“Most excellent,” Sookie smiled.

“Daddy you going to read me a story?” she asked.

“Of course,” Eric smiled at her as he sat down. “Let me pick one out,” as he wistfully watched Sookie walk away.

“Mommy is just in the bathroom Daddy,” Emmy got up and gave him a kiss. “Do not look so sad.”

Grinning, Eric sat her in her lap. “Continue on,” he said to Pamela as he tickled Emmy on the bottom of her feet and the biggest Billy Goat Gruff of all came calling on the troll!

 

 

“And the biggest Billy Goat Gruff of all came calling on the troll,” Eric snickered as they stood outside the luxury apartments in Shreveport.

“Yes,” Cedric smiled. “That boy’o Merlotte is part troll. Did not put it all together until I heard the story. His kind is a bit far from home. But their wrong doin’ ways follow them where ever they go. Yes, him matin’ with humans and eating’ their energy stream. He did not care how old they were. Anything is better than to be dippin’ your wick inside a female troll who would eat your brains while you were still alive if you tried to suckle her power. Egads and puking me guts out while a female troll licks it up with her…” he paused. “Well you know, her nether regions if she truly has some.”

“So what are we looking to find when we enter?” Eric asked.

“I am of a mind he is not a very big troll. Somewhere along the way an ancestor mated with a shifter human. His warlock is not tall, either. Now was his Alligator persona. So probably of the shorty trolls.

Since he used to bring a human female here, all should be human sized. He would fucking hate that but you must be true to the skin you are wearin’.”

“So we what?” Ian asked. “If this is his nest we just salt it down?”

“Yes,” Cedric nodded. “But we have to find the troll nest. Then he will go a little nuts, wherever he is and you know the Supernatural community. They will rat him out in a heart-beat if his yellin’ and sceamin’ does not bring us a runnin’ first.”

“This is definitely the smell of the warlock,” Eric nodded his head. “Not a strong smell so he is not at home.”

“Up stairs we go and look in the windows,” Samuel grinned. “The last time we played Peeping Tom was in Paris.”

“Would love to forget that one,” Eric growled. “Still makes me want to puke.

Oh look, there is an alarm on this window. Samuel. Time to work your electronic magic!”

 

Once they were inside all four opened their salt bags and went to work sprinkling one of God’s greatest earthly gifts.

Samuel shook his head. “He really is a poser. Look at this. Right, like he took this photo of the sun coming up over the Pyramids. Good thing Pamela is not here. She would torch the place just to make an example out of him.”

“Oh-h-h-h,” Ian sounded very pleased as he knocked on walls. “Hollow,” he grinned. “Feeds over to the next apartment. Well, let’s see how this troll lives.”

“Find the mechanism,” Cedric warned. “He could have it spelled to vanish or some such if there are unlawful intruders. Then he could just continue on someplace else.”

“Good thought,” Eric said as he moved the objects on the wall. When the door slid open, they walked through.

“What is that stench?” Ian said wiping at his eyes.

“Dried troll dung,” Cedric responded. “They keep the shit of their ancestors, literally.”

“That is just wrong,” Samuel replied as he took out a handful of salt and beginning spreading it around the room. “It appears that he tans human hides to make the coverings for crudely made chairs.”

“Yes, no wood working expertise, what…so…ever…” Eric snarled. “This furniture is small…even for a six-foot human.”

“Shorty trolls,” Cedric nodded. “They do take the brunt of the jokes in Eire.”

“Well let him take the brunt of our wrath,” Eric grinned as they all tossed the salt into every corner and crevice.

“Don’t forget the ceiling,” Samuel said. “We will know if it is spelled if it sticks.”

“Sure enough,” Ian said in wonderment as he watched the ceiling resemble a snow-covered field.

“Down stairs we go. Let us go fuck with the human side of Sam Merlotte and see what that gains us.”

 

Daryl the Wizard was having a moment as he sat in with a coven, explaining how he was shot by the poser Shreveport Slayer to keep him from closing the portal.

They all clucked their tongues and made hand signs for the evil eye as he continued his sad tale of woe and how his many and varied talents had been wasted on All Hallow’s Eve.

“Now here we are on All Saint’s Day,” he shook his head and made a face. “Whose idea was that? There are no Saints that walk this earth. Or humans worth their salt-t-t…salt….salt…” the word stuttered, repeatedly as he tried to finish his sentence.

“Oh no…no…no…no…” he cried and stood up shrieking. “Someone has salt…salt…” the word continued on until he was up and dancing a jig.

“Salt,” he screamed, “Salt we piss and salt in the briny sea.

I have set the spell

and someone wishes me to hell

For my nest is clean and I have uttered my death and so I shall take my leave!”

“What the fuck!” Zeela stood and pointed at the troll-looking-human that was peering back at them beneath the hood.

“Whirl around,” Sam laughed in glee and stood and twirled on his knees.

“You are here and I am there and tomorrow we shall neither be here or there.

So dance a bit and jig a bit and watch the moon and stars,

For I am a troll a hungry troll and while you spin a kabob you ar…..”

“Ladies,” Eric and his boys had vamped in. “Please, allow me to dispose of this for you,” Eric smiled as he picked Sam up by the scruff of the neck, his legs, arms and feet flaying around.

“Thank you Sheriff,” they one and all bowed their heads in gratitude.

“Miracle child,” Eric chuckled. “So, one of you wanted to give birth to a troll. Just keep that in mind the next time someone makes you an offer that is just too fucking good to be true. You know that new-born trolls try to eat their mother. With a human to suckle from, I think they could probably succeed.

Oh…and please note, any of you bring your nasty-assed ways to Bon Temps. You will be turned into a toad.” Bowing, Eric slammed Sam against one of the sacrificial rocks in the henge. Hearing bones crunch, smiling he and his fellow vampires were gone.

 

As they approached Sookie’s land, the merry band slowed down. “Yes Sam,” Eric grinned. “There really is a miracle child. That would be Sookie’s and mine Miss Emmy. And our daughter is bona-fide. Get ready to be a toad.”

“What?” Sam’s eyes got round and then Eric stepped over the property line.

And then Sam’s eyes were always round as Eric tossed the toad to the ground.

“Oh,” Pam said as she was vamp speed out. “What was that squish?”

“That squish was Sam Merlotte, shorty troll,” Eric grinned. “Cedric will be the one to tell this story. After all, he has the Irish accent and it just sounds so much sexier coming from him.

 

 

 

A year has passed and it is late Oktober. A deep and abiding and beautiful Fall has arrived in the South.

I am a manufacturer of goaty-goat soap so I can give jobs to my community. I am a witch when I want needful things. (In truth, Gran and I, I don’t think you would call us witches. We would just think on ourselves as guardians of the earth.

I will say a blessing if one is needed. I just call that being a good neighbor.)

 But that needful things list is extensive. Rain once a week so there is water for the lawn. Keeping the crows off the roof. The mice out of the house. Roses that don’t get mites, no to bag worms (yes seriously), and for some reason the finches pick the petals from the roses and line their nests. (We need those petals for making soap!) Keeping the milk fresh past the expiration date.

We need for the goats to be healthy, the lavender to grow big and strong, the rosemary to always stand guard and the pecan grove to produce, produce produce! See needful things.

 I am known in my community and in the supernatural world as well. I am a telepath. I do telepath work occasionally because I live with the vampire Sheriff of Area Five. He handles those bookings and guarantees my safety if I agree to the job. So that is a great big yes to the question. I know Eric Northman, Bad-Ass Vampire, The Viking…the Big Stud with the Tight Ass and Daddy to our Daughter. So that means I have known him in the Biblical sense! You betcha! Every night and multiple times during the day if we are sneaky enough.

So. Yes. Your world can turn on a dime.

Mine did…

 

Yes we still make soap and gather for breakfast outside under the porch on nice days. Potlucks are the go to words on any given day and Poppi-La La still reigns supreme in the kitchen and the barns.

In the fall, we now offer Halloween hay rides…Ian and Cedric are the vampire wagon drivers, complete in Victorian dress. The crowds love these two, especially when Cedric starts telling his stories. And his ghost stories can scare the pee-wadding out of you.

And because they are tied into Eric and Eric is part of the Northman Triad, well, those boyos can be out and about on partly cloudy days. Along with Missy Pam who manages their asses.

We have school kiddos that wander through our pumpkin patch and pick one to go home with them to decorate their yard and adults that drink Lafayette’s special apple cider…it gets rave reviews!

I also wear Eric’s rings and his last name. My husband is very fond of saying it just looks damn…fucking…good on me. Of course, he only says that when we are alone, together. And that is getting to be more and more difficult as the twins continue to grow and take up valuable real estate in my tummy. The Ides Of March cannot get here fast enough!”

 

We welcome one and all to the old farmstead. Hey, come on out and pick up a few pecans and smell the rosemary! But if you come on our land with your nasty-assed ways and meaning to do us harm we will turn you into a toad…just sayin’.

 

Sookie, lover, you dropped the g….

…just saying.

 

There are the sounds of long, passionate kissing with deep guttural moaning. Clothes are straightened and there is the noise of someone beating their chest and a Tarzan yell fills the air!

 

Thanks, Eric. You can always get my tongue untwisted!

Just saying!

So you good folks, come this way and spend Halloween with us. We have ghost stories that will put the curl in your hair or take it out. Just saying!

 

Dear Readers,

Happy Halloween!

My big push today was to get my Halloween story finished. So here tis! Please pardon the mistakes…I know they must be numerous.

If you are kind enough to leave a review, I will do my best to say thanks, today. Please note that starting tomorrow, if all goes well I am out of the loop for the next six weeks and have no idea when I would be able to respond with a thank you note.

I am having knee replacement surgery tomorrow morning. It will be a heavy drugs and then physical therapy until the new joint and I are in cahoots! Six weeks and maybe a bit more or a bit less.

I appreciate all good thoughts and prayers. A lit candle is gladly appreciated as from the smallest light comes the greatest things!

Happy Halloween!

As always, thanks for reading!

Be blessed and be the blessing,

CES